super vote: ( left this week)
Lost Puppy... and I haven't seen my pussy for a while either.
05/01/13 10:58:11
India nappyless 500
06/03/13 9:52:58
It was too late to throw in the towel
06/10/12 7:22:42
The view from the park was the dogs bollocks.
24/09/12 7:11:10
And here's our Graham with a quick reminder...
13/08/12 10:13:20
Police believe they have discovered the body of Shoregar
18/03/13 8:11:45
Best Before : 16-AUG-77
27/11/12 16:19:37
Not everyone is cut out for life in the Royal family.
08/11/12 20:00:59
One man and his bog.
05/02/13 12:26:01
As she held Mike's lips tight against hers, Mike drowned.
01/11/12 9:17:26
Pete & Dave were perfectly cut out for this job.
10/09/12 7:15:44
Your swimming pool filter is clear now, Mr Barrymore.
21/08/12 19:01:06
This is one of the hardest competitions on SpotTheMonkey.Me so far.
05/03/13 12:42:37
Only marginally better than his usual trick of talking through his arse.
19/11/12 12:11:05
Hamish proudly pipes in the opening of Glasgow's 1000th methadone clinic.
12/09/12 11:02:09
Mickey, your horoscope says 'Pluto will be in conjunction with Uranus tonight'
20/03/13 12:12:58
Must ... maintain ... eye ... contact
06/02/13 8:06:16
Three years, two months and twenty-one days after his gastric band was fitted, Dave caught a glimpse of his penis.
14/12/12 12:03:13
I told you to wank more often; don't wait ten years for the next one.
12/11/12 13:13:19
Glasgow's primary schools are to be fitted with larger bins.
05/11/12 12:24:21
Oh no, not another dog.
01/09/12 7:58:53
Because someone already had 'W4NK3R'.
25/03/13 12:59:17
When touring Korea a packed lunch is essential.
18/03/13 20:00:17
Honestly officer, almost everyone behind me demanded that I remove the mirrors from my bike but I don't know why.
22/01/13 9:14:34
Michael Jackson's unopened 51st birthday presents go on sale at Sotheby's.
13/12/12 5:35:51
🎵 Smack my witch up 🎵
09/12/12 5:00:59
Here come the Belgians and they're playing their joker.
08/11/12 14:20:46
When I asked for a hand with the coffee I didn't mean ....
21/10/12 7:44:49
Stalag Mite
02/10/12 7:11:40
Nine out of ten people enjoy a good shag.
15/09/12 19:38:49
A severe winter meant many Welsh people had to improvise.
23/08/12 19:01:22
This week I'll be showing you how to smuggle up to two kilos of cocaine, without anyone suspecting a thing.
15/08/12 11:16:30
Free willy, but ribs are three quid a pound.
28/02/13 9:10:02
🎵 I'm forever blowing Bubbles 🎵
27/02/13 18:34:03
And I'll just post that snap to my FaecesBook page.
30/12/12 12:17:41
☎ "Hello, Mr Savile? It's the laundrette here. It's about your dirty laundry... are you sure you want us to air it in public?" ☎
22/12/12 7:03:02
No matter how well disguised Dave's wife was, she couldn't hide her haemorrhoids, but he loved her anyway.
21/12/12 12:51:28
The last thing I got out of this old thing was 'chopsticks'.
18/12/12 12:16:44
This house has everything but the kitchen stinks.
25/10/12 7:07:41
"I'll have the foie gras to start... then roast guinea fowl with Dauphinoise potatoes... and a Double Decker."
13/09/12 7:13:00
Only John knew why he always referred to his guns as 'pee shooters'
20/08/12 7:28:12
It was sheer good fortune that on that fateful day I had worn a necktie.
24/06/13 7:10:09
The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain.
11/05/13 7:21:16
Confucius say 'Never follow rice flour truck too closely'
28/02/13 12:22:40
Paunch and Judy
11/01/13 8:07:40
Yeah, we had sprouts at Christmas too, how did you guess?
03/01/13 10:42:25
Hai Wei Robbery
29/11/12 8:39:21
Bird shit cleaner to aisle four please.
22/11/12 8:13:34
Drunk and quite orderly
05/11/12 14:27:48
You know dear, when the instructor said you'd need to strap the snorkel on, I think he meant strap it to your face mask, but carry on doing it your way.
02/04/13 8:06:29
Fortunately Dave was so hideously ugly that he'd never need to know the correct way to put a condom on.
08/03/13 13:06:36
Water shortages hit Tom Daley's training schedule.
08/02/13 8:13:36
Oh Vay! He's already circusized.
06/02/13 20:15:42
🎵 Stools out for summer 🎵
05/02/13 13:03:52
After completing the works of Shakespeare, Bobo moved on to helicopters.
30/01/13 8:14:52
Oooh, Oooh, Aghh, Aghh, Aghh, no really, those exhaust pipes are bloody hot.
28/01/13 12:12:33
It would be the last time Bob asked Dave to 'push his stool in a little bit'.
01/01/13 11:10:41
Completely out of the blue.
26/11/12 8:16:38
Justin Timberlake was 'N Sync.
28/09/12 7:18:20
B&Q launch Britains first assisted suicide plus burial service.
19/09/12 7:02:53
"What I love most about being a Ryanair pilot is that they pay us peanuts"
01/09/12 11:07:51
I doubt anything has been nailed in that bed.
21/05/13 11:55:25
Carlsberg don't make women easier to shag but if they... Oh wait, no that's wrong, Carlsberg do make women easier to shag.
10/03/13 15:29:41
Romanian gang arrested for fencing stolen horse meat.
22/02/13 9:14:26
Why are there so many captions about guns?Ah ... I see it now !
16/01/13 12:49:53
The combat ration chicken vindaloo was officially classified as a weapon of ass destruction.
15/12/12 10:00:25
I warned you about the sprouts.
11/12/12 9:44:11
Only one of them was a smart dresser.
06/12/12 8:18:18
Get that flea ridden, crapping everywhere, bird brained monstrosity out of here, and make sure the parrot goes with her.
22/11/12 8:21:41
Get off the road, you stupid Fokker.
01/11/12 17:57:20
God admitted that He'd made a very small cock up.
23/09/12 7:26:27
Jackanory with Victoria Beckham
22/09/12 19:24:08
Jim was looking for somewhere to crash near the airport, as was the pilot.
25/08/12 9:27:45
The lads had hoped to get laid, pissed and stoned on holiday. In Saudi, two out of three ain't all that bad.
16/08/12 11:06:14
Hoping for a turd term in office
17/05/13 11:16:40
Do you want me to slip six inches between your buns?
29/03/13 8:02:31
I shit on your grave.
15/02/13 12:03:27
This week I'll be showing you how to get perfect floury baps every time.
13/02/13 8:50:22
🎵 I got the brains, you got the looks, lets make lots of ...🎵 aah, no waitRight, I've got the brains, you got the ... the errr ... you got the... err, hat? No, you got the sandals? No, you got the ... Ah fuck it... 🎵 West End Girls 🎵
07/02/13 8:23:44
Jim was happy to leave his Cox on the table for all to see.
06/02/13 8:08:57
"If you're mocking me, I'll have to kill you" thought Gregory.
05/02/13 9:04:08
"Fancy a chinese?""No thanks, I'm having trouble keeping my kebab in."
02/02/13 8:28:28
Not as cute as Aleksandr and not as old as Sergei.You did want me to compare the meerkats, right?
28/01/13 8:37:51
Paul? Paul Parker? Can you autograph this for me?
25/01/13 12:26:44
The boss had an inkling that the new guy was a plant from one of their competitors.
06/01/13 12:09:35
Noah was driving around looking for the carp ark.
17/12/12 8:45:37
This is the worst phishing scam you've thought of so far.
11/10/12 12:23:38
When she said she had a ginger pussy I didn't believe her.
05/10/12 19:40:04
And God thought "Wait a minute, I could hide that with some curly hair"
23/09/12 8:18:19
Big Ron always fell asleep after having a Chinese.
12/09/12 7:08:11
Raj shows how he survived the Mumbai Airport toilet flood of 2011. "I just kept one foot on a stool" he told reporters.
08/09/12 10:26:23
The three bears hadn't quite mastered the new facilities.
02/09/12 7:15:56
"She canny take it any more Captain"
31/08/12 7:40:30
This time Greta, don't let the kids out until we're in the hotel room.
22/08/12 19:03:06
Here come the Belgians, and I'm playing with their joker.
23/06/13 9:28:18
Bugger. What's the chances that I get the ginger one?
04/06/13 5:44:27
They were both giants of their sport.
03/04/13 7:08:47
But I don't have Down's Syndrome !
11/02/13 8:08:42
Admin Announcement :Caption.Me has implemented the new 'auto-captioning' software to save us all a lot of time in front of the computer.
31/01/13 8:04:05
Admin Announcement :With so many cow pictures recently this site will now be known as "caption.meat"
23/01/13 14:36:52
39 - 48 29 - 38 19 - 28 9 - 18 1 - 8
Ha ha ha - good one
comment on caption: A severe winter meant many Welsh people had to improvise. [Spud Gunn]
Yes, loved it too.
And a Great Dane at that.
comment on caption: Oh no, not another dog. [Spud Gunn]
I am dazzled by your wit!
comment on caption: It was just another case of fairy (or omo) bashing, and he was slightly dazed by the bold, ariel blows coming his way but it was little comfort to know that he would eventually ecover and be able to surf again.This caption was brought to you by Proctor and Gamble. [Spud Gunn]
It's cruel, but hilarious!
comment on caption: Hamish proudly pipes in the opening of Glasgow's 1000th methadone clinic. [Spud Gunn]
I hate you butter
comment on caption: I hate you Butler ! [Spud Gunn]
Why? Is there no waiting?
Only skidding.
comment on caption: "I'll have the foie gras to start... then roast guinea fowl with Dauphinoise potatoes... and a Double Decker." [Spud Gunn]
email us
Ha ha ha - good one
11:22pm
comment on caption:
A severe winter meant many Welsh people had to improvise. [Spud Gunn]
Yes, loved it too.
8:46am
comment on caption:
A severe winter meant many Welsh people had to improvise. [Spud Gunn]
And a Great Dane at that.
8:51am
comment on caption:
Oh no, not another dog. [Spud Gunn]
I am dazzled by your wit!
8:13am
comment on caption:
It was just another case of fairy (or omo) bashing, and he was slightly dazed by the bold, ariel blows coming his way but it was little comfort to know that he would eventually ecover and be able to surf again.
This caption was brought to you by Proctor and Gamble. [Spud Gunn]
It's cruel, but hilarious!
11:56am
comment on caption:
Hamish proudly pipes in the opening of Glasgow's 1000th methadone clinic. [Spud Gunn]
I hate you butter
7:20am
comment on caption:
I hate you Butler ! [Spud Gunn]
Why? Is there no waiting?
8:41am
comment on caption:
I hate you Butler ! [Spud Gunn]
Only skidding.
9:53am
comment on caption:
"I'll have the foie gras to start... then roast guinea fowl with Dauphinoise potatoes... and a Double Decker." [Spud Gunn]