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Mark Wilson

Caption Wins:64

Signed Up:5 years ago

Profile Viewed:9 times this week

Super Votes:Quota: 18

Quotas and Scores

			This Week				Last Week				All Time
	Quota		Added	Score	Rank		Added	Score	Rank		Added	Score	Rank
Caption	10		0	0			0	0			3,078	5,119	46
Photo	10		0	0			0	0			0	0
Comment	3		0	0			0	0			43	78	60
Suggested Edit	2		0	0			0	0			0	0

Voting Record

	This Week			Last Week			All Time
	Voted	Rank		Voted	Rank		Voted	Rank
Caption	0			0			2,673	73
Comment	0			0			7	87

Best

Captions

Due to social distancing the pool only has water in lanes 1, 3, 5 and 7. So if the swimmer representing Ireland in the 200m backstroke could move to the next lane across please

"Welcome to Farmyard FM, just gone 7AM and this is for all the turkeys, it's Mariah Carey's all I want for Christmas is you"

All these animals on Noahs Ark and I'm the only one who feels seasick

Choking giraffe saved by Heimlich maneuver

Was a bugger to wrap so I'm never buying anyone a hovercraft for Christmas again

"No need to put your name in your coat, I don't think anyone will nick it"

"I told you Mum's wheelchair was too wide"

Excellent, I give this product 5 star rating - Susan from Bristol Q... Has your bottom got softer,looks or feels better due to the Enriched Vitamin E - Dave from London A... What a great question Dave, I honestly think it has - Susan from Bristol Q... Got any photo's? - Dave from London A... *uck off you pervert - Susan from Bristol

Hello Autoglass, I've got a chip in my windscreen

Just leave it No, I'm getting that pound coin out of that supermarket trolley

"And 8 months later the Grand Designs team are back to see how the project is progressing"

"I can't wait till the beauty salons open again" "You and me both honey"

Toast... testing smoke alarms since 1961

"Follow me it's the quickest way to the beach"

I don't fancy their chances of making it across the English Channel in that.

That's him Dad, he's the frog that threatened me

Tina had just been run over by a car, but just when she thought her day couldn't get any worse..

"Not gonna lie it was hard work getting up that waterfall"

Tony was later banned from these urinals

"Shit, I've dislocated my shoulder"

" You gonna tell her she's not allowed on the sofa"

"Can't believe the girls started the beach volleyball without me"

This is your captain speaking, just a bit of turbulence, nothing to worry about

"Excuse me, could your child stop blowing those dandelions now"

"Come on big boy I want you now!" "Having a bit of trouble swallowing the Viagra pill"

7,8,9,10 ... Coming ready or not

" It's me, open the door"

" We're behind schedule, you'll have to carry on working through your lunch"

Whoever did this deserves a S L A P

Eating chocolate coins with the wrappers still on hurts a bit, but your poo looks fantastic.

"Did you forget to tell that couple in room 11 about the fire alarm test?"

"Only the one life then... unlucky"

"Just saying I'm a miner, Dad's miner, Grandad twas miner, our sisters a miner and then there's you.. a geography teacher"

"I'm really considering going back to being a man again" "But why?" "I'd be on £2 more an hour"

I'm sure we've been past that building 4 times now, thought Ann

A skunkoodle, so that's a cross between a poodle and a .... argh my eyes!

"I wanted to win the goldfish"

Mum, what's a tit wank?

The tree surgeons aftercare service was a nice touch

My fault, I did asked for a short back and sides

Mr Kipling reveals how he copes with his mental health issues during lockdown

Finally photographic proof that Man Flu is worse than giving birth

Is it just me or are these Pot Noodle sauce sachets getting harder to open?

"Pity the visibility is bad, probably didn't miss anything anyway"

He died of a brain tuba

Oh shit perhaps I am left handed after all

"What's the plan if this all kicks off Sarge" "Taser the kid"

"I didn't join the police to stand here, I joined to book motorists doing 31 in a 30 zone"