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Dave had no idea where he'd beheaded next.

Hercules Rockefeller 22/01/21 20:19:57

I don't know either but it must be at breakneck speed.--Willie Johnson

"Hi, remember when I met you at the tip and you were throwing out your old filing cabinet." "Yes?" "Well, here's some pictures of what it is now, an outdoor lamp, unfortunately it hasn't sold yet."

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Ian Skelding 22/01/21 20:49:22

A pane in the neck.

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Ian Skelding 22/01/21 20:00:14

He has a glassy-eyed stare.--Willie Johnson

"Boomerang? What Boomerang?"

Lucky Elperro 22/01/21 21:05:06

Think about it for a minute. It'll come back to you.--Willie Johnson

Dave would do anything to avoid wearing a mask.

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Peter Houle 22/01/21 20:45:16

Nice of Boris to allow that one concession for mask exemption.--Mauris Iocus

I told the barber, "Just a little off the top."

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Scrijjy Doo 23/01/21 00:25:49

The unkindnest cut.--Willie Johnson

It sounds like bollocks, but for years we were haunted by the ghost of a headless naturist.

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Al Overy 22/01/21 20:27:41

Man has evolved to be chameleon-like and blend in to his surroundings. Unfortunately he has not yet managed it without his head exploding

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Mr Dome 22/01/21 20:21:09

Dave found himself out on his arse, after being deemed too bright for the SNP Cabinet.

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Stephen Paterson 22/01/21 20:15:42

Headless Houseman

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Stephen Bean 22/01/21 20:00:05

You may laugh, but since he's been up there they haven't had a single honey badger.

Michael Winner 23/01/21 13:17:23

"I don't know. We were fencing and then all of a sudden I can't see, hear, smell or taste anything."

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Willie Johnson 23/01/21 07:34:24

"I'm not really bothered that hairdressers are closed."

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Vanessa the Guesser 22/01/21 20:03:35

Always take care when opening hinged windows. Injuries can occur.

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James Lennox 22/01/21 20:03:25

He might need to head to the doctor.--Willie Johnson

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