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Nathan's social life was going downhill fast.

18/04/18 7:24:46

Bar None.

13/04/18 21:29:22

He's about to pop his Kellogg's

12/04/18 11:05:24

Keep your dirty hands off my bust!

08/04/18 11:53:32

"Close your eyes Zoe, bulimic Sam's behind us."

11/03/18 12:45:45

Nice but dim.

03/03/18 13:18:57

"Taxi!"

01/03/18 20:11:38

Pay As You Go

25/02/18 8:33:57

Ma'am's best friend

12/02/18 22:02:44

Ohm My God!

01/02/18 12:05:27

Dermatologists test samples of Gulliver's acne.

24/01/18 20:18:51

Realistic security guard blow up dolls for sale - no battery required

19/01/18 21:38:48

Dober Man

18/01/18 21:08:49

Times are hard for Scary Spice these days. She can often be seen wandering the corridors of posh hotels playing a tiny mouth organ.

15/01/18 20:49:23

She's two koi to take it off

06/01/18 12:01:10

Everyone worries about their waste measurements in January

05/01/18 12:38:26

The Hay Wayne

03/01/18 8:02:50

"Ok ok, keep your heron".

27/12/17 20:05:01

Hospital x-rays revealed that he had indeed swallowed his surfboard.

22/12/17 8:01:35

What happens in the butchers, stys in the butchers.

10/12/17 9:25:26

He's always been a bit of a loose canon.

09/12/17 20:10:27

Does my ass look big in these stripes?

25/11/17 8:01:01

clever

Yule-tied

21/11/17 13:37:46

creative

Luckily for Wendy it was Halloween and nobody would mention the extra hand she had growing out of her back.

31/10/17 12:57:17

"Speak up Mum, we canardly hear you at the back!"

31/10/17 10:15:50

They can't stop watching the salad dressing.

28/10/17 12:03:30

Close, but no Shergar.

21/10/17 11:01:51

Basil fondly remembered the times before he'd won Spot the Ball and ran everywhere instead of taking a cab.

17/10/17 11:14:39

She would need to change at Crewe.

15/10/17 12:49:01

"Doyathinkhesaurus?"
"Nah"

07/10/17 19:12:25

Max Bygraves

06/10/17 7:00:36

One of my 5 a day

18/09/17 19:02:43

I've been suffering from terrible wind, but my doctor said to just monitor it.

10/09/17 14:18:01

Members of the National Trussed.

07/09/17 8:06:51

Emily had waited that long in A&E for her cyst to be drained that it was now no longer a problem.

03/09/17 7:34:57

Abandoned at the side of the rodeo.

27/08/17 10:20:01

My husband spent more than a penny on these.

20/08/17 19:00:23

Del Monte Carlo or bust

15/08/17 11:01:13

Best in Show at Crafts 2017.

14/08/17 19:18:24

They've got squatters.

29/07/17 19:43:33

When the x-ray department is closed, the hospital signs could be a little politer.

23/07/17 7:04:41

It was a huge disappointment to hear that Vera Lynn was headlining at Glastonbury again.

12/07/17 21:54:37

Next time I'd like beanies on toast.

10/07/17 12:00:52

Einstein loved his new hair straighteners.

26/06/17 7:17:05

What a lovely pair of knockers.

03/06/17 7:10:49

I wonder if he's got a prickly pair?

13/05/17 7:21:59

I've always found turkeys are a bit tough.

08/05/17 19:06:47

lol

🎵 Surprise, surprise
An unexpected wheelbarrow hits you between the eyes 🎵

22/04/17 19:39:27

Special Ranch.

20/04/17 7:01:29

Learning her lines on the way to work is top Asian actress Halle Tosis.

08/04/17 7:13:09

Mike was really looking forward to the Glove Puppet Convention.

06/04/17 7:04:05

Watch out for an influx of one liners.

31/03/17 7:01:28

Wedding Crècher

25/03/17 12:27:21

Maybe it's an old Austin Princess

14/03/17 12:09:53

"Anyone for a capuchin-o?"

03/03/17 12:43:45

Must be Old Age travellers.

24/02/17 8:54:21

Harry Ramsden

19/02/17 11:57:54

Super glue is a great deterrent for kids who watch too much television.

08/02/17 12:00:16

Crash test mummies

04/02/17 8:00:29

🎶 I'd like to teach the world to singe 🎶

30/01/17 23:03:41

He wanted to be a Lidl banana like the others

25/01/17 20:07:58

Palm Reading

22/01/17 8:06:40

The Logical Choice

21/01/17 8:15:15

Last year he'd damaged his left ankle but now the boot was on the other foot

09/01/17 8:06:21

Full Speedos Ahead

31/12/16 8:10:01

clever

This sign is also available in braille

23/12/16 12:45:27

Police confirm that the snowman with a penchant for young children is a local drifter

20/12/16 12:26:40

Chop chop, time to get up!

27/11/16 13:49:36

Dozy parker

22/11/16 8:00:24

Gill never got anywhere fast - mainly because her feet were always in the quarter to three position

12/11/16 20:00:41

Volkswagen customers taken for a ride once again

19/10/16 11:49:51

Bernie Clifton's ideal woman

12/10/16 19:02:18

Tabloid peddler

11/10/16 19:01:59

When it came to paying the entrance fee, she wasn't sure where to swipe her debit card

02/10/16 19:11:45

Binge liners.

07/09/16 7:04:22

Time to upgrade your Windows safe mode

03/09/16 11:06:37

"Remember, it's important to floss after eating."

"I can't, I'm a terrible dancer."

31/12/24 20:32:41

All purrfectly cooked from scratch.

14/12/24 12:52:36

Shady characters

07/12/24 8:03:36

An ideal Christmas present for your poor Grammar.

23/11/24 8:05:16

When you've wasted your money on broken down cars and have nothing to chauffeur it.

15/11/24 20:16:47

"At least he hasn't asked me to iron his nuts."

29/10/24 8:20:47

The Lord is my German Shepherd

18/10/24 19:04:53

Celebrating Yuletide.

15/10/24 7:02:14

He maid America great again.

05/10/24 11:03:20

Caber FC played brilliantly for a team of tossers.

29/09/24 11:16:22

For recreational use only.

20/09/24 19:03:51

Holly went to work for the BBC as she had nothing else on.

19/09/24 19:11:21

Looks like the French are on strike again.

11/09/24 7:21:20

Dave soon realised his trampoline had been stolen.

07/09/24 19:04:10

Was last seen having completed some Medical Receptionist training.

26/08/24 19:15:38

All was calm until the announcement 'Westlers Hotdogs available in the Foyer.'

22/08/24 19:21:43

There's been several fudged robberies round here.

14/08/24 7:07:22

The origami club used to hold their meetings in the toilets before it folded.

24/07/24 19:06:09

"Some Robin bastard's nicked me handbag."

14/07/24 19:09:29

Where is Uncle Tom's Cabin?

12/07/24 7:04:58

Queen Elizabeth II took to the stage, shortly after the artist formerly known as Prince Philip.

29/06/24 19:07:13

"Do you, Tina, want to have another 9 incher?"

"I do "

29/06/24 7:09:58

"Damn, I've forgotten my wallet."

"Well, at least you can do the washing up in super quick time."

22/06/24 7:06:43

They saw the zebra crossing and ate it

29/05/24 11:04:53