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	Dave was later arrested for driving at full tilt. 01/06/20 11:53:07	7

	Back off! Me don't want siblings... 20/03/20 8:35:03	7

	"The missus treats me like a dogsbody" 12/03/20 12:42:35	7

	"Dave, when I said 'Take a seat'..." 21/02/20 8:13:52	7

	"...and here's Fay with her latest squeeze." 09/02/20 14:43:44	7

	'Darn sight tastier than that crap the old woman sells for tuppence a bag,' Peter thought. 03/10/19 13:46:05	7

	"Sir, that's not the handbrake" 01/10/19 19:16:27	1 7
Well that's not the cigarette lighter receptacle. --Scrijjy Doo
	I hate window shopping 17/08/19 12:45:03	7

	Eddie Van Halen a taxi 04/05/19 13:21:36	7

	lol "I fake tanned before I came out, okay?" 01/03/19 21:31:34	7

	lol Helicopter hairdos are more prone to crash landings 06/01/19 14:09:21	7

	"Hah! That's the last time he'll try to p-p-p-pick me up..." 20/09/18 7:05:55	7

	"Huh, what's this paper stuff? I heard her bag's full of bread." 31/08/18 7:15:17	7

	Tittoo 10/08/18 7:13:47	7

	It's generally easier swimming with currants 26/07/18 20:04:01	7

	Walls have fears 15/06/18 17:37:28	7

	Nora Batty 05/04/18 7:42:19	1 7

	She'd bagged herself a bloke 01/03/18 8:04:57	7

	Having a skinful can be A positive experience 05/02/18 8:04:45	7

	'Now,' pondered Miss Jones, 'Where is that file on "Acceptable Dress Policy and Sexual Harassment in the Workplace"?' 17/01/18 15:11:39	7

	Satzoomer 09/01/18 8:40:06	7

	Keeping her heir dry? 21/12/17 15:55:00	7

	Waiting for a vote 09/12/17 10:21:59	7

	- "Can I have my shirt back, Officer?" - "Button it, Sonny." 06/10/17 14:42:00	7

	"Yeah, sometimes she's putty in my hands but other times she can be a pane." 09/07/17 19:29:23	7

	Dave hits the headlines 04/02/17 20:17:56	7

	Len's waiting in the wing 10/01/17 19:22:43	7

	"I'd try one, but I do think the little man on the top is rather garish!" 05/01/17 9:17:22	7

	"New Year's resolution? To remember to put my top on before my early morning jog!" 02/01/17 8:01:31	7

	"Don't mess with me Officer! I broke a nail doing the grocery shopping and I am NOT happy!" 30/12/16 11:11:56	7

	lol "Oooh Mabel, I'll race you to t'seefront!" 07/12/16 8:18:20	7

	With a little more stretching he'll have jug ears soon 23/11/16 20:22:04	7

	The town boasts a small car plant 09/10/16 19:47:02	7

	'My other car's a shed!' 03/09/16 12:20:46	7

	A rust bouquet 21/12/24 20:43:37	6

	"We distinctly said 'No tomato'." 17/11/24 20:10:42	6

	Jeremy identifies as a whale. 24/10/24 7:06:11	6

	Bing Bong - THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SPEAKING- "If you look right you'll see we seem to have p-p-p-p-picked up a few penguins" 14/10/24 7:09:46	6

	"Soots you, sir." 11/10/24 7:50:38	6

	Made in Saudi Arabia 26/09/24 19:33:46	6

	"Olive is in the lead, closely followed by Margherita." 16/09/24 7:11:38, edited: 16/09/24 7:15:16	6

	"I haven't seen you in years, Christopher Robin. You're just in time for breakfast." 12/09/24 7:13:06	6

	lol 🎵 If you're happy and you know it clap your- 08/09/24 19:08:18	6

	Deliver-oh! 28/08/24 7:57:44	6

	I travelled for days across this desert trying to find a public convenience and when I did it's occupied by a constipated parrot, AARRGH! 23/07/24 7:17:29, edited: 23/07/24 7:22:20	6

	"Darn! My tyre B flat." 31/05/24 7:22:59	6

	Perfect gift for that kid who you've no clue what they're into. 23/05/24 18:11:00, edited: 25/05/24 6:45:39	6

	🎵 Walk like a Venusian 🎵 23/05/24 7:54:14, edited: 23/05/24 8:31:51, suggested edits	6

	"I'll get there any which way I can" 09/05/24 7:12:11	6

	If he keeps on he'll get a sentence. 06/05/24 11:13:47	6

	Bloomin' lavley 04/05/24 7:01:37	6

	"Dave, when we were looking at bathroom suites and I said I fancy something a little bolder..." 27/04/24 7:16:54	6

	Sermon tank 11/04/24 19:29:48	6

	"That reminds me, Dave...Did you get some cream for your infection?" 03/04/24 12:16:22, edited: 03/04/24 12:24:15	6

	Looks like he's got a screw cap loose 24/03/24 8:11:53	6

	Fillies really shouldn't go there 06/03/24 20:05:25	6

	"I'd prefer the Nag's Head" 06/03/24 20:02:23	6

	"No Dave. This is not a suitable alternative to a litter tray" 25/02/24 12:10:50	6

	"Just licka mama used to make." 13/02/24 12:56:25	6

	"GERRROFF MY BLOODY BIKE, Goldilocks! 20/12/23 20:25:26	6

	"Ah, a Sun, Pat." 20/12/23 13:50:28	6

	"He's absolutely useless and he gets through so many rubber gloves..." 14/12/23 20:08:58	6

	"Goldi, you've got to stop doing this. I'm a happily married bear now with three cubs. Please learn some social boundaries." (Nod to 20:06:35) 13/12/23 20:07:42, edited: 13/12/23 20:10:02	6

	On the one hand he could always reach those annoying little itches but flipping heck, nail-clipping day was a nightmare. 11/11/23 8:42:21	6

	'The bug won't know what's hit it,' thought Dave 09/11/23 8:06:00	6

	"Eh...So, what's up, Doc?" "You've got a bit of a temperature." 27/10/23 19:27:32	6

	"I served in the war but my memory of it is a bit woolly." 25/10/23 7:04:49	6

	I'm sure it'll be open again in a few shakes 19/10/23 7:18:15	6

	As Jack grew older he grew boulder 11/10/23 11:31:34	6

	"I SAID 'NO GHERKIN'!" 01/10/23 7:25:14	6

	🎵 Should I stay or should I go now? 🎵 09/09/23 19:13:08	6

	🎵 La Isla Bone eater 24/08/23 7:22:44, edited: 24/08/23 7:26:57	6

	"They really light up the room" 23/08/23 7:07:57	6

	"Perkins, call the waterboard immediately. We appear to have a problem with the water supply." "Yes, mallard." 22/08/23 19:39:27	6

	clever "Would anyone like a slice of gato?" 20/08/23 19:04:27	6

	He won Best in shortcrufts pastry 02/08/23 19:14:03, edited: 02/08/23 19:15:31	6

	It was a head-on crash 16/06/23 7:02:31	6

	Herby Rides Again 01/06/23 19:01:53	6

	Vauxhall Astra Turf 01/06/23 19:00:30	6

	"You're not going out like dressed that!" "Don't you like it?" "You won't fit through the door." 28/05/23 7:08:32	6

	Not what I was expecting for 'Doggy style'. 27/05/23 7:04:09	6

	The perfect place to start the crawl 27/04/23 19:15:51	6

	Kitty kitty bang bang 09/04/23 7:01:05	6

	"Poor sod can't even reach the bar, look. It's the last time we come for a night out with a Shetland pony." 06/04/23 7:07:44	6

	It was all going really well until the Best Man jumped on the bride. 03/04/23 11:24:03	6

	What came after the service was a let-down. 03/04/23 11:06:42	6

	And there's a fashion that went down the tubes 29/03/23 19:40:00, edited: 29/03/23 19:43:06	3 6
Smartie pants? --KimJong Pun
	"She'll be fine, I've tied her onto the bike." 28/03/23 19:25:44	6

	A la Carde menu 27/03/23 7:00:25	6

	Cello Kitty (more room) 06/02/23 12:35:35	6

	Sniffs I'd have preferred fishcake." 25/01/23 12:29:12	6

	Hmm, that's unusual. I see the occasional Jaguar... 14/01/23 14:28:49	6

	"In future, Jane, you might wanna keep the laser pen away from the dog." 10/01/23 12:50:00	6

	Time warp 01/01/23 20:00:19	6

	"Time of the month, Tina?" 27/12/22 10:27:01	6

	Cat out of hell 15/12/22 8:00:21	6

	I think it's an origurinal 09/12/22 20:37:03	6

	Mobile manicurist, Bev, admits she has some challenging clients 19/11/22 8:09:33, edited: 19/11/22 8:09:50	6

	Man with no face muscles devises ingenious way to pull facial expressions 05/11/22 12:07:32	6

	They're not lovin' it 28/10/22 19:18:08	6