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	This Week				Last Week			All Time
	Quota	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank
Captions	63	25	42	#9	46	116	#2	13963	33630	#4
Comments	14	5	4	#3	5	4	#3	1455	1692	#4
Suggested Edits	2							7	6	#11
Photos
Forum Posts								13

	This Week		Last Week		All Time
	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank
Captions	31	#8	47	#5	14130	#16
Comments	2	#5	1	#7	1205	#7
Suggested Edits	1	#1			21	#3
Photos			2	#5	681	#29
Forum Posts

captions comments received captioned photos

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	''Cheese!'' ''Actually, they're smokey bacon.'' 29/11/22 8:01:34	13

	''By identifying as a potato, I'm hoping to develop a thick skin.'' 27/10/22 7:44:41	13

	''A vote for me is a vote for change.'' 25/10/22 11:10:12	13

	lol ''I've managed to attach the wreath to the front of the van.'' ''Well done. Now throw the coffin in the back and let's get going. We need to be at Westminster Abbey by 11.00am.'' 18/09/22 7:41:11	13

	lol ''Dave was one of our most dedicated Snaptioneers. He would do anything to get a good photo. He will be greatly missed by all his friends on the site.'' 13/08/22 11:09:02	1 13

	Winner of the Hooker Prize 24/07/22 19:09:11	13

	creative ''This is stressing me out, dad. Where's the button to turn the page?'' 29/05/22 11:02:57	1 13
"Your brother will know. Phone him.""With what?" --Glad You Remember
	''Who's the father?'' ''God knows.'' 06/05/22 11:07:33	13

	Two men who deserve to be hung. 27/03/22 19:00:13	7 13
Prints are supplied in 4 pieces...having been hung, drawn and quartered. --Stephen Bean
	lol ''Hey, guys....'' ''Shut up, driver. She's taking off her blouse.'' 05/02/22 12:13:52	1 13
Lions and voyeurs and boobs, oh my! --Glad You Remember
	''That tapeworm is putting up a jolly good fight, girls.'' 04/02/22 20:12:59	13

	TEXT: ''Have you ever had an accident that was not your fault?'' REPLY TEXT: ''Why the f-ck do you think I'm getting married?'' 29/01/22 12:12:39	13

	Son worshipper 31/12/21 20:34:15	1 13
For the other son, it looks like a total eclipse. --Willie Johnson
	''I did not have an affair with Camilla while I was married to Diana.'' 21/12/21 12:01:01	1 13
"... and don't be a nosey Parker Bowles." --James Lennox
	lol ''How now, brown cow?'' 10/12/21 8:04:36	13

	''This is for getting stuck up the wrong chimney last night.'' 06/12/21 8:00:34	13

	''I'm afraid there's been a big mistake. Leopold is not buried here. It must be some other fucker.'' 25/10/21 11:03:24	1 13
It's probably some Kunt or Koch --Glyn Evans
	''Look, dad, a flying saucer is coming our way.'' ''Makes a change. Your mother usually throws the teapot at me.'' 10/09/21 7:21:58	13

	''I am f-cking smiling.'' 15/08/21 7:09:57	13

	clever ''At least I'll have no problems hanging his shit on the trees.'' 03/07/21 11:28:17	13

	lol ''Are you going to be long, mate? I'm desperate for a hiss.'' 05/05/21 7:00:36	13

	Passing out parade 29/04/21 11:00:09	13

	''Whatever people say, we'll never quit the habit.'' 27/04/21 11:00:10	1 13
Ok, habit your way. --Willie Johnson
	''What are those men doing, sergeant?'' ''They didn't feel well, sir, so I put them on light duties.'' 16/03/21 12:03:55	13

	Sadly, their drunken father was later thrown out of the Tate Modern for making an exhibition of himself. 11/03/21 12:21:28	1 13
Apparently Tracey Emin's bed was too inviting. --Karyn Harrison
	''Say cheese.'' 04/02/21 8:01:01	13

	''He married her because she was good in the sack.'' 24/01/21 20:14:22	13

	Sorry I missed you. Next time I'll hit you with it. 05/01/21 8:00:38	1 13
I hit everything else though - the house, the car, the walkway, the porch, the mailbox.... --Willie Johnson
	''I haven't seen my family for weeks.'' ''Because of the restrictions?'' ''No, I just f-cking hate them.'' 24/09/20 19:10:30	13

	''It's not just the very narrow fairway that makes the fifth hole so challenging for golfers.'' 21/09/20 11:30:42	1 13
It's also the extremely large gophers. --Willie Johnson
	''Mr Hefner, you've forgotten your 'T'.'' 31/08/20 19:01:19	13

	Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet, eating her curds and whey. Along came a spider who sat down beside her. That's the third one she's eaten today. 22/08/20 7:40:01	13

	''Ha! Ha! The Queen is wearing that ridiculous hat again.'' 10/08/20 7:18:32	13

	''What kind of fish are you?'' ''Don't tell him, Pike.'' 14/05/20 7:04:31	1 13
If you do...WE're ALL DOOMED. --Woofer 6
	Dave couldn't understand why he only ever caught flat fish. 13/05/20 7:24:39	2 13
He goes fishing for the halibut. --Willie Johnson
	lol ''Cut! Sly, can you try and look a bit more animated in the next shoot?'' 21/04/20 7:15:53	13

	''Have you you been tested?'' ''Yes, they say I'm f-cking crazy.'' 03/04/20 7:05:13	13

	clever Grounded! 31/03/20 11:40:41	1 13
A reasonable punishment. --Scrijjy Doo
	Friendly fire 14/02/20 20:05:07	13

	''If you want some action, fellas, just give me a ring.'' 07/01/20 8:02:50	13

	''Sarge, we've got the right Donald.'' ''OK, let the Duck go.'' 30/11/19 9:07:50	13

	NO KITE FLYING 07/11/19 12:02:05	13

	clever The Sty At Night 19/10/19 7:00:15	13

	''Why am I under arrest?'' ''You're wearing a loud shirt in a quiet neighbourhood.'' 10/09/19 11:05:35	1 13

	''No, darling, I said you needed to put a coat on.'' 31/07/19 11:41:45	1 13

	lol ''Isn't that typical? You go for a coffee and when you get back some c*nt is sitting in your seat.'' 29/07/19 19:04:15	13

	lol Shoppers run for cover as plague of moths hits city centre. 26/07/19 11:08:10	13

	Inkling 23/07/19 7:04:57	13

	''She's wanted dead or alive. There's a price on her head.'' 07/07/19 19:28:38	13

	The Nan In The Iron Mask 26/04/19 12:26:21	13

	''Order! Order! Order! Order! Order!'' ''What's that noise?'' ''It sounds like The Speaker.'' 08/04/19 7:21:40	13

	clever ''They always come to Sainsbury's with me. They collect the nectar points.'' 04/04/19 7:04:40	13

	Warning: Heavy Plant Crossing 05/12/18 20:00:28	13

	Shia delight 14/10/18 11:10:13	13

	''Darling, when I said she wanted a Magnum.....'' 25/09/18 19:47:49	13

	Men Behaving Sadly 15/08/18 11:01:10	13

	''Apparently, the company isn't doing very well. They've had to call in the receivers.'' 19/06/18 12:36:14	13

	clever New Model Army Thu 8:01:34	12

	''Mittens, do you remember that captioneer who said he would hang himself, if another cat photo was voted up.....................'' 08/11/24 20:13:01, edited: 08/11/24 20:19:23	12

	''I got mine from the corner shop.'' 26/10/24 11:10:33, edited: 26/10/24 11:14:20	12

	''Did you buy Dave a big Christmas present?'' ''No, just a stocking filler.'' 19/10/24 7:40:52, edited: 19/10/24 7:54:15	12

	''Gran spent all morning in the chair. She was having one of her fizzy spells.'' 18/09/24 11:28:25, edited: 18/09/24 11:35:36	12

	Runner beans 09/09/24 7:06:57, edited: 09/09/24 7:07:42	12

	Wife imitating art. 07/09/24 7:04:40, edited: 07/09/24 7:11:55	12

	''I was going to build an extension but I ran out of dough.'' 01/09/24 7:02:58	12

	lol ''I wish he'd buy his own TV.'' 25/07/24 7:53:15	12

	''Czech, mate?'' ''No, Austrian.'' 29/06/24 11:30:39	12

	Perhaps a Mac will help to keep the rain off. 25/06/24 19:24:08	12

	''Our family always dines here. Between 4pm and 6pm kids eat tree.'' 09/06/24 7:20:28	12

	lol DAVE CHANG'S LABORATORY IN WUHAN ''Rex, be a good dog and keep an eye on this Covid virus for me. I'm just off for a quick round of golf.'' 06/05/24 19:31:35, edited: 06/05/24 21:25:02, suggested edits	1 12

	As Dave had received no response from his initial communication, he had to knock out another email. 06/05/24 11:27:55, edited: 06/05/24 11:42:25	12

	If there was any food left over, Dave would always hoover it up. 11/04/24 11:09:55	12

	''Sandra, are you talking out of your arse again?'' 20/03/24 8:01:44	12

	He should have looked in his wing mirror. 19/03/24 8:03:20, edited: 19/03/24 8:06:28	12

	THE ESCAPE ROOM ''I couldn't give a shit if Bob and Sandra solved it, Dave. We've been in here three days and I want something to eat.'' 04/03/24 12:50:56, edited: 04/03/24 13:13:08	12

	''If you don't start playing better, Albert, we're going to lose. I don't think you understand the gravity of the situation.'' 02/03/24 13:09:43	12

	JUST MARRIED Shotgun Wedding 16/02/24 8:05:10	12

	24 HOURS EARLIER ''Thank you for this wonderful mystery holiday, darling. You've no idea how much I need a break from the kitchen.'' 05/01/24 8:18:34	12

	''These bras are far too small for me,'' thought Trump. ''I'm the biggest tit on the planet.'' 26/12/23 8:11:08	12

	''Can you tell your husband to try and get it in the bowl.'' ''How do you know he doesn't?'' ''He pissed all over me when I was cleaning the bath.'' 24/11/23 12:48:01, edited: 24/11/23 12:48:14	1 12

	Victoria's secret 22/11/23 12:29:17, edited: 22/11/23 12:37:46	12

	''Keep still, guys, while he takes the photo. We're becoming an embarrassment.'' (see comment) 15/11/23 12:40:56	2 12
Why would my mum call me a group of pandas? --Brian Butterfield
	The Black Eyed Ps 15/11/23 12:03:36	12

	''The UK economy is booming, inflation is under control, health service waiting lists are going down and the Metropolitan Police are wonderful.'' ''Which planet are you living on?'' 23/10/23 19:31:05	12

	''Would you like another one?'' ''Yes, life is easier with two legs.'' 03/10/23 11:09:16	12

	''Smile, that's absolutely fantastic. Now pop in the truck and let's get you down to the slaughterhouse.'' 13/09/23 11:27:15	12

	Toilet key available from Customer Services on the third floor. 25/08/23 7:53:23	12

	Inhale Mary 19/08/23 11:52:06	12

	Jane was always making an exhibition of herself. 12/08/23 11:01:17	12

	''I don't mind you identifying as a dog, Dave, but I'm not having you sniffing my butt in the supermarket.'' 08/08/23 19:28:20	12

	''I told you we'd be bigger in the USA, Meghan.'' 14/06/23 19:05:14	12

	That awful moment when you can still hear the engine purring but you've just switched it off. 07/06/23 20:24:37, edited: 07/06/23 20:26:15	12

	The Fleeing Scotsman 04/06/23 7:16:07	12

	''So the barman says......So the barman says......So the barman says.......'' ''What's the matter?'' ''Sorry, I can never get to the finishing line.'' 06/04/23 7:36:05	12

	''We love it here. They always serve jumbo portions.'' 02/04/23 7:05:51	12

	''She's been very ill recently but fortunately they were able to cure her.'' 26/03/23 7:19:24	12

	Drum and Homebase 21/03/23 12:01:00	12

	''The chicken isn't making any noise. Does it need plugging in?'' ''No, it's a battery hen.'' 17/02/23 8:36:48, edited: 17/02/23 8:45:30	12

	''That's a coincidence, I write captions too.'' 09/02/23 12:25:12	12

	Mittens Got Talent 06/02/23 12:00:12, edited: 06/02/23 12:02:08	12

more captions

last comments (total: 936)

Congratulations, Dave!

:^)

Crunchy

Crunchy Chords

01/10/24
2:50pm

comment on caption:
"We can rescue the women and kids later." [Dave Bryan]

Excellent caption Dave! Well done!

KT A

01/10/24
3:10pm

comment on caption:
"We can rescue the women and kids later." [Dave Bryan]

Well done, Dave. Well deserved. Your wife and kids sent their congratulations too.

Al Overy

01/10/24
6:34pm

comment on caption:
"We can rescue the women and kids later." [Dave Bryan]

Ha ha, yeah Dave. It was ironic that my tortoise caption got off to an early lead, only to be run down by your beer caption wink You deserved the win, though, and kudos for contributing back to the site 👍

James Lennox

01/10/24
7:29pm

comment on caption:
"We can rescue the women and kids later." [Dave Bryan]

Thank you, Kathleen. Good suggestion.

(caption author)

03/10/24
6:59am

comment on caption:
De-parting is such sweet sorrow. [Dave Bryan]

Some years ago, a new dentist had the radio playing in his surgery when I visited - it was playing "Do You Really Want To Hurt Me?".

Molly R

28/10/24
8:38am

comment on caption:
''As you seem a bit nervous I'll put the radio on for you.'' 🎵 The first cut is the deepest 🎵 [Dave Bryan]

They can't make you cry though as they have laughing gas 🤔

Glyn Evans

28/10/24
9:31am

comment on caption:
''As you seem a bit nervous I'll put the radio on for you.'' 🎵 The first cut is the deepest 🎵 [Dave Bryan]

Furthermore, what could be quite fun would be if they had laughing gas sing-a-long championships

Imagine trying to contain yourself whilst singing "Everybody hurts", "Candle in the Wind" or even "Gloomy Sunday" 😂

Glyn Evans

28/10/24
1:28pm

comment on caption:
''As you seem a bit nervous I'll put the radio on for you.'' 🎵 The first cut is the deepest 🎵 [Dave Bryan]

It can’t be Harris I can’t see a cabbage.

[anon]

09/11/24
7:38pm

comment on caption:
BREAKING NEWS Trump picks his new team. [Dave Bryan]

Many thanks for the suggestion, Kathleen, but I think the Hank Mizell song is more in keeping with the aggressive rock attitude of the chimp than the insipid Jingle Bell Rock.

(caption author)

Saturday
9:26am

comment on caption:
🎵 It was a jungle, jungle, jungle, jungle rock 🎵 [Dave Bryan]

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