Sending private messages on this site is currently disabled due to abuse by spammers.

Please use the forum to send private messages instead.

	This Week				Last Week			All Time
	Quota	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank
Captions	34	31	47	#5	13	18	#17	10777	20389	#12
Comments	15	2	3	#1				367	279	#32
Suggested Edits	2
Photos								1	-1
Forum Posts								66

	This Week		Last Week		All Time
	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank
Captions	36	#10	35	#10	14877	#14
Comments					80	#48
Suggested Edits	2	#2	1	#1	3	#14
Photos					654	#30
Forum Posts

captions comments received captioned photos

captions

	"Can I get a copy of your Bolognese recipe Jean? .............." 08/05/17 7:04:03	15

	clever Between a rocker and a hard face 19/02/17 20:21:21	15

	Nothing and nobody gets in the way of the 8 o'clock caption. 03/09/16 7:01:12	15

	"I think you might have a puncher mate." 17/11/15 20:24:01	15

	"Sit down, you look shattered." 16/10/15 11:08:24	15

	"What makes you think I've cheated on you again darling?" 01/10/15 12:16:38	1 15
Very good. --Michael Monkhouse

lol x2 20/07/15 19:09:51		15

	We all need somewhere to reflect. 07/11/14 8:04:07	15

	Secret footage emerges of early Russia preparations underway for 2024 Paralympics 27/05/20 19:22:56	14

	Donald Trump's advisers suggest he enters Mexico discreetly for the summit meeting. 07/03/19 8:30:43	14

	" ...... your call is very valuable to us, you are now 3rd in the queue ..." 11/01/19 8:20:35	14

	clever Mike mainly sang about his fishing trips 07/11/18 9:22:04	14

	She was hoping to land Phil 11/12/17 12:46:25	14

	lol "Looks like you've been collared .... Oops" "Now don't start acting all shirty .... oh sorry again" "Ere, has anyone got any cuffs? ....... really sorry mate, you must think us terribly insensitive." 06/10/17 13:12:40	14

	lol They did a lovely job with the bandages, after the incident with the seagull. 02/10/17 20:10:07	14

	"Twit, tw.., tw.., ahem ......... sorry it's no good, I've got a frog in my throat." 10/02/17 8:07:29	14

	During the pregnancy, Prunella had some very strange carvings.. 19/12/16 20:07:26	14

	Salmon Ella 08/12/16 12:03:07	14

	"I told you not to wash her with the Red Setter." 09/06/16 7:11:49	14

	Yule tide 02/04/16 7:36:55	14

	"Hello Sir ...... the Escort you ordered ..." 12/03/16 20:38:14	14

	Normally he didn't go for this type ...... he preferred his girls to be a little dimmer. 01/11/15 20:05:58	14

	Sally just found out that she had three half brothers. 25/07/15 11:18:40	14

	"Any chance you girls fancy handling swollen goods?" 30/04/15 19:09:13	14

	clever The body of Christ - concrete evidence. 26/01/15 8:18:13	14

	The Welsh appear to have raised their game after losing in their own back yard last time. 19/09/14 19:26:59	14

	"Before accepting the terms of the job, little Jack carried out a full Rusk Assessment." 06/08/14 19:37:13	14

	Pitcher Postcards 25/05/14 19:19:02	14

	"Who are you calling a Cox sucker?" 07/04/14 7:30:42	14

	You cannot wear real fur without loss of face. 20/02/14 11:29:50	14

	The bedroom always brought back memories of night mares. 06/12/13 8:02:23	14

	Burlesconi's shadow cabinet 26/09/13 19:20:47	14

	They both refused to be suede 18/01/13 8:12:48	14

	Voted Witch Magazine's best value vegetable stall 15/11/12 12:01:00	14

	He's been like this since he was Bjorn 13/05/12 10:14:06	14

	"House Arrest..........HA, I laugh at your house arrest" 22/04/12 10:15:54	1 14

	Auto-Biography 19/03/12 20:12:12	14

	Post Erectile Dysfunction 13/02/12 20:07:33	14

	Mice Cubes 03/02/12 20:01:54	6 14

	Following the 'coming out' of Frank Maloney, Suggs is next ..... it's absolute Madness. 30/09/14 9:37:22	13

	"So Mary ........... you look a little different from your profile picture." 03/09/14 11:07:18	1 13
"Yeah, sorry. You should now call me Mark." --Doh Nutter
	Prisoner 9763 had been on the run for almost 4 years. 20/08/14 7:45:14	13

	Inflatable pool ......... beware of punchers 26/07/14 11:35:32	13

	Amazon ...... for all your deliveries 14/07/14 11:04:12	13

	Sports kit 24/06/14 19:40:08	13

	Once again the chance to win the painting eludes Tim as he fails to land the hoop on the cross and it sits there mocking him on the head of the statue. 10/06/14 7:12:14	13

	"Mrs Francis ...... we're going to let you back up now as there are some inspectors coming to the care home. Now remember, you have a sore throat and can't speak." 06/05/14 11:07:56	13

	Mount Olympus 01/05/14 19:13:40	13

	"Have you completed a whisk assessment form?" 20/04/14 19:04:41	13

	Cat gut your tongue? 11/03/14 20:08:21	13

	"Dennis ........... there's a bird in the forecourt wants to put down a deposit on one of the cars." 25/02/14 20:08:29	13

	Kerb your drink habit 22/11/13 9:06:00	13

	"How's a girl to choose the right bouquet?" 23/08/13 19:24:25	4 13

	creative Tony's profile picture may suggest that he hasn't quite grasped the point of match.com 17/06/13 19:09:04	13

	When Oliver said that he was kipping in Lucy's pad last night, no one believed him 22/03/13 20:30:58	13

	Hooked on cigarettes 03/02/13 8:58:48	13

	creative Digitas 14/01/13 20:04:12	13

	Minors Strike 15/12/12 12:00:42	13

	"Wrong gear mate" 22/11/12 20:18:26	1 13

	After losing a fortune on poker.com Tony realised he had been playing a Cheetah 15/11/12 20:09:13	13

	Time to Deathecate 06/11/12 8:17:37	13

	"Watch the flock in road....Bitch" 19/10/12 19:23:43	13

	Post Traumatic Stress 12/10/12 19:05:36	13

	"I'll Bee back" 26/08/12 8:19:33	13

	Jeremy was known for his wandering hands 05/06/12 19:18:27	13

	Guess we can rule out a Swallow 19/05/12 20:20:59	1 13

	Amour Plated Glass 08/05/12 19:13:51	13

	The brochure suggested holidaying in Bath 05/05/12 10:13:16	13

	Chris Beach's To Do board 18/01/12 20:36:50	13

	Hazel was an emulsional wreck. 08/01/12 11:21:02	13

	The two brushes looked out of sink. 15/12/11 12:54:38	13

	“Mary, your blind date has arrived” 23/10/22 19:34:35	13

	clever Today at kitty cycling proficiency class, there were more pupils than anticipated. 12/10/22 7:10:28	13

	Mick wore his best black shirt and was happy to get paid as an extra - he had to admit, he just didn't understand these tampon adverts. 07/05/19 7:13:46	13

	"That's nothing, yesterday at dinner she slipped into a Korma ...." 13/01/19 9:16:19	13

	Bungee jumping "¦"¦"¦. what harm can it do? 03/10/18 11:01:31	1 13
Brilliantly crafted. I couldn't think of a funny line with bungee jumping in it. --Funny Bean
	Guess which bloody glue they used 04/06/18 11:22:41	1 13
Made me snort. --Barrie Bullock
	" .... just putting you on hold" 04/01/18 12:15:04	13

	Human trafficking 20/11/17 8:51:03	13

	"Don't worry Dad, I think he just recognises some of the songs on your iPod." 07/10/17 19:30:07	13

	lol x2 Sperm bank showcase their new mobile units. 02/03/17 12:09:03	13

	They brought gold, frankfurters and myrrh 24/12/16 12:12:57	13

	The Cocaine was turning him into a vegetable. 10/11/16 8:17:00	1 13
...until, thank God, he found a step program. --Greg Curtis
	The Morris Minor was an elegant classic but Matt preferred the Escort. 25/09/16 7:13:01	13

	"Morning and welcome to this mornings slave auction, first lot a male, 176cm tall, good teeth and comes with a free hat ..........." 11/06/16 7:09:08	13

	Flared trousers 22/09/15 7:48:57	13

	Although it was a statue, there were signs of a movement. 12/09/15 19:55:18	13

	clever BBQE2 26/05/15 19:25:14	1 13
I wonder where it is baste --Boycie
	He's died and gone to Evian 29/04/15 7:13:31	1 13
Lol! --Cath Jones
	lol "Have you been rimming those sheep again Grandad?" 24/04/15 7:02:57	1 13
"I've been...b-a-a-a-a-d." --Greg Curtis
	A bum note 09/11/14 13:04:16	13

	Marmite …. you either love it or hate it 11/10/22 11:44:34	1 12

	The steaks have just been raised. 18/08/19 19:05:38	12

	I decorated the hall this weekend and took your advice about going for a 'boulder look'. 12/10/18 11:01:34	12

	Does that still apply for a 4 x 4? 17/09/18 12:00:54	12

	"Davis, in the red trunks, looks like he's about to deliver that lethal right rook........" 18/08/18 8:28:21	12

	Just an appetiser ......... he's got a pair of Pumas saved for later 16/08/18 7:41:52	12

	... because Christmas is for students too .... 07/12/17 12:09:43	2 12
Ravioli Christmas dinner ........ sounds divine --John Llamas
	As the bills kept on coming, she was beginning to think she may be in deep water. 31/10/17 11:26:02	12

	lol "Thank you for applying for the job here at Screwfix and we are pleased to hear how excited you are about our staff discount scheme .. unfortunately, on this occasion however ..........." 27/10/17 11:07:15	1 12
"Here When You Need Pus" --Crunchy Chords

more captions

last comments (total: 470)

Is that why you sometimes see him leaning forward at an awkward angle?

Willie Johnson

16/11/21
1:04pm

comment on caption:
Trump supporters [John Llamas]

"Anna we're Lawrence Welk's daughters: Anna One, Anna Two."

Willie Johnson

27/11/21
5:14pm

comment on caption:
“Hi Pat, come in .. I’m Anna Conda
Sorry about the profile pic” [John Llamas]

Dr. Womb

Scrijjy Doo

08/04/22
8:29am

comment on caption:
Graham Norton unveiled as the next irrepressible time-traveller, Dr Who, seen here with his new assistant … [John Llamas]

Brilliant!

[anon]

11/10/22
2:07pm

comment on caption:
Marmite …. you either love it or hate it [John Llamas]

Oh, I hadn't realised they were all linked to you! What will I catch you doing next?! You haven't been dressing up as Santa have you?!😉

Kate B

18/10/22
5:37am

comment on caption:
“Hello Police ……. I want to report a stalker … Kate B. She has been following my parents skinny dipping, messing with my collection of ventriloquist dummies, scaring my dog and horse and I’m worried she may be watching me now…” [John Llamas]

When I've a Bent...
--------------------
I'm very often vertical,
Horizontal, too, I find.
At times, of course
I'm neither nor -
But only when inclined. circa 1980. [Anon]

[anon]

18/10/22
9:46pm