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	This Week				Last Week			All Time
	Quota	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank
Captions	63	27	53	#7	46	116	#2	13965	33641	#4
Comments	14	5	4	#3	5	4	#3	1455	1692	#4
Suggested Edits	2							7	6	#11
Photos
Forum Posts								13

	This Week		Last Week		All Time
	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank
Captions	31	#10	47	#5	14130	#16
Comments	2	#5	1	#7	1205	#7
Suggested Edits	1	#1			21	#3
Photos			2	#5	681	#29
Forum Posts

captions comments received captioned photos

captions

	creative It was dangerous but necessary. Neither of the cricket teams had remembered to bring a coin with them. 21/03/21 12:02:32	10

	The mourning caption 19/03/21 8:00:37	10

	lol ''If we say our prayers, will Saint Peter let us into Heaven?'' ''Yes, as long as you don't piss on the gate.'' 13/03/21 8:07:32	10

	Ready to quit cigarettes? Why not try pipe smoking? 07/03/21 12:00:47	1 10
"I dunno, with all the packing, lighting and puffing, pipes are too exhausting."Nod to 14:02:46 and 12:00:08 - not seen before posting. It shows that great minds think alike (and feeble ones too - haha just kidding). --Willie Johnson
	Postman Prat 05/01/21 8:33:20	10

	The piss artists formerly known as Prince. 19/11/20 12:02:06	10

	''If you don't want to lose your sunbed when you fly off for lunch, it's best to crap on it.'' ''Thanks for the tip, Mr Gull.'' 09/11/20 12:11:10	10

	Splatoon 30/08/20 7:24:20	10

	''I think we should take him back to the pet shop. He hasn't said a word since we got him.'' 20/08/20 19:00:58	10

	''I haven't had a vote for six weeks.'' ''My gondolences.'' 15/08/20 11:12:12	1 10
Have you tried pressing the "add caption" button? --Willie Johnson
	Spice Girls refuse to sing more than one hit single on Australian tour. 14/08/20 11:18:51	1 10
Yeah........a song about bestial solicitation in the Spice Girls repertoire would surely make even the most dedicated fans a bit jumpy. --Glyn Evans
	lol ''You ain't leaving me are you, Marshall?'' ''A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.'' ''You mean......'' ''That's right, I need to post some more captions.'' 03/08/20 11:13:11	10

	''Shouldn't we have five a day?'' ''Morning and evening is enough for me.'' 12/07/20 11:46:50	10

	The beginning of a very long neck-ing session. 06/07/20 19:00:44	10

	Dyeing breed 05/07/20 7:02:45	10

	Tee Rex 02/07/20 19:01:19	10

	''To be honest, Jane, I'm not that hungry.'' 30/06/20 11:00:43	10

	''I always use PPE because I'm a key worker.'' 19/06/20 7:13:49	10

	Fighting the flab 11/06/20 19:00:26	1 10
Chin up better luck next time. --Morgan .
	''Seize Up Mother Brown'' 19/05/20 12:03:39	10

	''You did great there, Tommy. The man up the road hasn't caught anything.'' 14/05/20 7:00:41	10

	Tea Rex 03/05/20 7:01:04	10

	No girl can resist the charms of stone face. 21/04/20 7:00:51	10

	''Sorry, boys, we need to shoot that again. Can somebody remove the idiot who keeps waving at the back?'' 05/04/20 7:44:41	10

	''What are the chances of this caption getting a vote?'' ''My newt.'' 26/03/20 8:08:18	10

	When it's over who's going to pick up the pieces? 22/03/20 12:01:26	1 10
Just don't step on them barefoot. --Willie Johnson
	''Since the outbreak of Coronavirus the business has gone to pot.'' 18/03/20 8:16:44	10

	Coronavirus Breaking News: China has announced that all flights have been grounded. 24/02/20 8:02:12	10

	''Be quiet. Don't you know there's a wailing ban in force?'' 13/02/20 20:19:15	10

	''Lean backwards - pass it on.'' ''Lean backwards - pass it on.'' ''Lean backwards - pass it on.'' ''Lean backwards - pass it on.'' ''Agh!'' 05/01/20 20:23:17	10

	Cycle of violence 26/11/19 20:00:47	1 10
That's one way to break it. --Scrijjy Doo
	The Grand Old Duke Of Yorkie 19/11/19 8:10:42	1 10
He had ten thousand women. --Molly R
	''The main course is cooked but I'm having problems with the starter.'' 16/11/19 9:11:02	10

	''Make up your mind. Are you going to help that old fart wrap up the presents or would you prefer a blow job?'' 03/11/19 8:03:22	10

	''Down, boy.'' 24/10/19 11:00:59	10

	Now available in pouches 22/10/19 19:01:19	10

	''What! Sup Doc?'' 21/10/19 11:21:10	10

	It's a difficult photo but I'm still going to post something. 16/10/19 7:07:07	10

	''Would you like some more fish, Tom?'' ''No thanks, I'm stuffed.'' 15/10/19 11:25:18	10

	''It was a great shame about old John. He kicked the bucket getting into the bath.'' 07/09/19 11:05:45	10

	Another captioneer collapses with exhaustion after trying to think of something funny. 07/09/19 7:44:43	2 10

	Bark and ride 27/08/19 11:00:17	10

	She goes down nicely after a bottle of wine. 13/08/19 19:42:45	10

	''You need to move that, mate. This is a no-fly zone.'' 21/07/19 11:04:34	10

	''OK guys, you've nailed that one.'' 07/07/19 11:02:48	10

	''I wonder if I'm sniffing the right end.'' 07/07/19 7:04:42	1 10
No it taint. --Scrappy Doo
	''What bigamy problem?'' 20/06/19 11:06:32	10

	''Never Mind The Horlicks'' 09/06/19 20:24:37	10

	''This is his favourite course. He just loves the greens.'' 26/05/19 11:02:20	10

	''And, furthermore, I find your captions only moderately amusing.'' 13/04/19 7:12:34	10

	D'or handles 13/02/19 20:00:59	10

	''This sunburn is killing me. I should have married someone with bigger tits.'' 18/01/19 20:28:17	10

	''When happy hour starts there's usually a stampede.'' 30/11/18 20:01:20	10

	Raleigh discovers America 23/11/18 8:00:22	10

	The poor birds have had the stuffing knocked out of them. 12/11/18 20:03:18	10

	One Foot In The Gravel 09/11/18 12:01:30	10

	''Miserable bastard! I only had one foot on the seat.'' 22/10/18 7:29:54	2 10

	Arctic Circle line 22/10/18 7:00:16	10

	lol He's definitely out according to Auk-Eye. 20/09/18 10:33:57	10

	Underarm tactics 31/07/18 7:04:47	10

	Whatever the opposition, Schwarber usually got the runs. 19/04/18 7:16:18	10

	''I'm suing my management agency. I've had three top ten hits and they're still paying me peanuts.'' Sat 8:12:01, edited: Sat 8:12:25	9

	''Push! Push!'' ''Sorry, I've had six already. I can't stuff any more down.'' 11/11/24 12:07:21, edited: 11/11/24 12:47:29	9

	''Who is that fat old guy?'' ''Well, it can't be Prince Andrew.'' 29/08/24 7:12:24	9

	''I think gran's incontinence is getting worse.'' 23/08/24 7:09:05	9

	🎵 Everybody was Kung Fu fighting Those cats were fast as lightning 05/08/24 11:46:05	5 9
It is definitely 'cats' just looked it up.I'm 56 years old. --Karen McDonald
	''Why have you pulled me over, Officer?'' ''Because you have caused a dangerous outbreak of dreadful old fish puns. Incidentally, if any more appear later, I want you to let minnow.'' 03/08/24 11:13:23, edited: 03/08/24 11:31:54	3 9
Hahaha. 'I want you to let minnow.' That's a gudgeon --Mr Dome
	Don't you just hate it when someone turns up wearing exactly the same dress as you. 10/07/24 11:03:47	1 9

	Beach bum 27/04/24 7:25:47	9

	lol ''Take me home, I can't be arsed with this.'' ''And every entrant will receive a dozen cans of tuna from our sponsor.................'' ''Perhaps I was being a bit hasty.'' 24/04/24 7:14:49	9

	''Can you multiply?''' ''No, I've been neutered.'' 18/04/24 19:50:49	9

	''The skittles are behind you, mate.'' 02/03/24 12:01:54	9

	''Gattle of Gosworth.'' 23/02/24 12:07:49	9

	''I needed a new challenge after spending so many years bending spoons.'' 21/02/24 12:08:43	9

	''Are you game, Sandra?'' ''Yes, Dave.'' BANG! 08/02/24 20:28:19	9

	''We should never have stolen the car, Dave. I knew the police would be dragged into it.'' 04/02/24 8:14:43	9

	''Take care when using this appliance. Remember you're Dyson with death.'' 16/01/24 8:25:41, edited: 17/01/24 7:59:25, suggested edits	2 9
No probs, Cap Auth. It was halfway between "Be careful" and "Take care", so I just picked one ;) --James Lennox
	🎵 One can't get no satisfaction 🎵 04/01/24 8:33:25, edited: 04/01/24 8:35:58	9

	''Come quickly, darling, I can see a dog on the lawn inside a giant bubble.'' ''You tried that ruse last time you got bored in the middle of a shag.'' 20/11/23 8:09:02	9

	''What's he going to be when he grows up?'' ''A captioneer.'' ''I pity the fool.'' 18/11/23 8:43:21	9

	''I'll get the bill. I'm loaded.'' 07/10/23 11:14:05, edited: 07/10/23 11:16:21	9

	creative She's always had Rex appeal. 05/10/23 7:06:03, edited: 05/10/23 7:12:57	9

	''You look exhausted, darling. Let me help you feed the cat.'' 15/09/23 7:30:09, edited: 15/09/23 7:57:36	9

	King of the Chews 23/08/23 11:24:51, edited: 23/08/23 11:34:21	9

	''It makes me so angry. We have this wonderful new technology and those stupid women from the village are still going down to the well with their clay pots.'' 12/08/23 7:39:54	9

	Jane had used the train so often she felt like she was part of the furniture. 13/05/23 7:00:09	9

	''Look on the bright side, darling. You can't see the coffee stain anymore.'' 28/04/23 11:31:07	9

	''The fowl and the pussycat went to sea................'' 15/04/23 7:07:57	9

	''Sarah, I feel sick.'' ''I'm not surprised, dad. That's the apple Snow White was eating.'' 07/04/23 11:45:53	9

	''I m glad to see they've introduced new road safety measures here. Yesterday one of my friends was hit by a car and had the stuffing knocked out of her.'' 28/03/23 7:06:54	9

	''While we were away a squatter moved in.'' 18/03/23 12:08:16, edited: 18/03/23 12:22:19	9

	''I love you, Jane. Will you marry me?'' ''There's a dog having a crap right behind you.'' ''I'll take that as a 'maybe'.'' 04/03/23 8:10:31, edited: 04/03/23 8:17:12	9

	Double time 02/03/23 20:00:10	9

	''Who's been sleeping in my bed,'' said Daddy Bear. ''It would have been more romantic if you'd asked my name before shagging me.'' 13/02/23 8:00:51, edited: 13/02/23 8:11:30	1 9

	House doctor 01/02/23 12:00:38	9

	Scream cheese 28/01/23 12:00:14	9

	creative I once ate a captioneer to make myself funnier but he kept repeating on me. 27/01/23 14:40:45	9

	''And when William discovered I hadn't given him a plastic toy with the meal he grabbed me by the collar and pushed me to the ground.'' 22/01/23 21:58:32	9

	''I wish Dave wouldn't use my hand to cover his mouth when he sneezes.'' 22/12/22 12:45:46	1 9

	''When I offered him cash for the car he nearly took my hand off.'' 21/12/22 8:32:27	9

more captions

last comments (total: 936)

Congratulations, Dave!

:^)

Crunchy

Crunchy Chords

01/10/24
2:50pm

comment on caption:
"We can rescue the women and kids later." [Dave Bryan]

Excellent caption Dave! Well done!

KT A

01/10/24
3:10pm

comment on caption:
"We can rescue the women and kids later." [Dave Bryan]

Well done, Dave. Well deserved. Your wife and kids sent their congratulations too.

Al Overy

01/10/24
6:34pm

comment on caption:
"We can rescue the women and kids later." [Dave Bryan]

Ha ha, yeah Dave. It was ironic that my tortoise caption got off to an early lead, only to be run down by your beer caption wink You deserved the win, though, and kudos for contributing back to the site 👍

James Lennox

01/10/24
7:29pm

comment on caption:
"We can rescue the women and kids later." [Dave Bryan]

Thank you, Kathleen. Good suggestion.

(caption author)

03/10/24
6:59am

comment on caption:
De-parting is such sweet sorrow. [Dave Bryan]

Some years ago, a new dentist had the radio playing in his surgery when I visited - it was playing "Do You Really Want To Hurt Me?".

Molly R

28/10/24
8:38am

comment on caption:
''As you seem a bit nervous I'll put the radio on for you.'' 🎵 The first cut is the deepest 🎵 [Dave Bryan]

They can't make you cry though as they have laughing gas 🤔

Glyn Evans

28/10/24
9:31am

comment on caption:
''As you seem a bit nervous I'll put the radio on for you.'' 🎵 The first cut is the deepest 🎵 [Dave Bryan]

Furthermore, what could be quite fun would be if they had laughing gas sing-a-long championships

Imagine trying to contain yourself whilst singing "Everybody hurts", "Candle in the Wind" or even "Gloomy Sunday" 😂

Glyn Evans

28/10/24
1:28pm

comment on caption:
''As you seem a bit nervous I'll put the radio on for you.'' 🎵 The first cut is the deepest 🎵 [Dave Bryan]

It can’t be Harris I can’t see a cabbage.

[anon]

09/11/24
7:38pm

comment on caption:
BREAKING NEWS Trump picks his new team. [Dave Bryan]

Many thanks for the suggestion, Kathleen, but I think the Hank Mizell song is more in keeping with the aggressive rock attitude of the chimp than the insipid Jingle Bell Rock.

(caption author)

Saturday
9:26am

comment on caption:
🎵 It was a jungle, jungle, jungle, jungle rock 🎵 [Dave Bryan]

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