Sending private messages on this site is currently disabled due to abuse by spammers.

Please use the forum to send private messages instead.

	This Week				Last Week			All Time
	Quota	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank
Captions	68	15	11	#5	71	129	#2	18067	43749	#1
Photos						4	#8	74	266	#11
Comments	12				2			1011	804	#11
Forum Posts								213
Suggested Edits	5							57	61	#2
Tips

	This Week		Last Week		All Time
	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank
Captions	15	#3	76	#3	18939	#9
Photos					2193	#10
Comments			4	#3	1050	#9
Forum Posts
Suggested Edits					17	#4
Tips					4	#2

captions comments received captioned photos

captions

	Backgammon to the Future 22/09/21 11:11:15	5

	"It's time we told you the truth kids. One of you is adopted." 15/09/21 19:02:11	1 5
Or two of you? --Willie Johnson
	"I love dancing cheek to cheek." 10/09/21 11:24:18	5

	Small fry 09/09/21 11:00:20	2 5

	Bog Day Afternoon 07/09/21 7:50:29	5

	Triple jump 28/08/21 19:20:03	5

	Pink pong ball 25/08/21 11:14:33	5

	"Mum, Dad, this is my gillfriend." 24/08/21 12:05:39	5

	"I surrender. You can have the kid. She only cost me 5 euros." 15/08/21 7:07:44	1 5
It's still five Euros though... --Glyn Evans
	Babies are now required to pass more stringent tests before being allowed to appear on caption.me 14/08/21 11:01:54	5

	A well balanced child 14/08/21 11:01:03	5

	Olympic skateboarding - inspiring future generations to spend most of their weekends in casualty. 10/08/21 11:01:44	5

	"I torte I saw a puddy cat." 03/08/21 7:11:30	1 5
This one gave me paws. --Scrijjy Doo
	Chicken Royale 28/07/21 11:00:07	5

	"It was those bloody muppets on their bicycles." 27/07/21 11:19:28	5

	The other side reads: BITING, SWALLOWING OR DIGESTING HUMANS IS PROHIBITED 27/07/21 7:00:12	5

	I bet he still can't find her clitoris. 26/07/21 19:29:48	5

	"...and this is why stepping on that drawing pin means you only have hours to live." 25/07/21 19:14:48	5

	"Today I'm following a recipe from King Alfred's cookbook." 18/07/21 7:19:13	5

	Delia Smithy 18/07/21 7:00:09	5

	"...and you say this was one of the happier times in your childhood", said Anon's counsellor. 12/07/21 19:48:30	5

	A matter of line and death 08/07/21 11:34:21	5

	Heil jump 04/07/21 11:15:54	1 5

	Herbievore 28/06/21 19:00:07	5

	"Hello, is that armed police? Come quickly. A giant cat just leapt out of nowhere and grabbed my car. I managed to get out but it could notice me at any moment... Yes, you should shoot to kill." "STONEFACE, WAKE UP! You're having another nightmare." 26/06/21 11:00:14	5

	"Duke, I am your father." 21/06/21 11:47:03	1 5

	Danger Mouse 19/06/21 11:00:08	5

	"Eat up Dave. You're not you when you're hungry." 18/06/21 11:00:09	5

	"What was that you said about my caption being similar to yours?" "Oh nothing. Did I mention I just gave you a vote?" 17/06/21 19:00:41	5

	Tom Baker 17/06/21 7:08:18	1 5

	Tour de Romance 15/06/21 19:03:39	5

	Altar ego 10/06/21 11:02:26	5

	Don't you just hate it when your friends post how much weight they've lost on their latest diet. 10/06/21 7:00:08	5

	Dolly Parched-tongue 08/06/21 11:32:39	2 5
Or Parched-tongue --Troompa Loompa
	Queen Picktoria 02/06/21 11:00:36	5

	Elizabeth Mary Windsor, Queen of Snots 02/06/21 11:00:12	5

	"I know why you're here Shrek. I know what you've been doing... why you hardly sleep, why you live alone, and why night after night, you sit by your computer." "You're a captioneer." 31/05/21 19:22:37	5

	"What kind of paint are you using?" "Ronseal." 26/05/21 7:00:21	5

	"Oh sh-t, wrong pole. I thought there were only penguins here." 24/05/21 7:05:43	5

	Oeuf shattering discovery 22/05/21 0:03:30	5

	"Get a roo-m!" 16/05/21 11:00:30	5

	clever The Calamari Sutra 15/05/21 11:01:19	5

	A funny thing happened on the way to the orifice this morning... 02/05/21 7:10:14	5

	I'll never understand the rules of golf. 29/04/21 7:04:44	1 5
That's cricket I suppose. --Willie Johnson
	Benson & Pledges 27/04/21 11:38:28	5

	Message from the last surviving ship from planet Detergentia's invasion fleet Earth is better protected than we realised... 23/04/21 7:11:35	5

	I think this relationship is a monumental mistake. 20/04/21 7:09:16	5

	"Hello, it's the orphanage here. I think we have your daughter's cake and you have one of ours." 19/04/21 19:01:08	5

	This week on Homes under the Hammer Horror... 17/04/21 18:19:35	5

	"Darling, have you been feeding the goldfish spinach again?" 17/04/21 11:00:35	5

	The bowl and the pussy cat 17/04/21 11:00:09	5

	"Miracle Gro gives me a massive chard on." 16/04/21 13:24:36	5

	Annie Oaktree 12/04/21 19:56:05	5

	The Abominimble Snowman 06/04/21 7:14:09	5

	Pedaling drugs 03/04/21 19:33:09	1 5
That's a lot of drugs. --Willie Johnson
	Gigolo available for any captioneer with a spare Â£50. Willing to travel. 01/04/21 19:00:18	7 5
Depends where you go, Mr Dome. In Doncaster, it would get you a good shag and 23 quid change --The Wolf
	"You should've seen the one that got away." 01/04/21 11:04:03	5

	It was a Shogun wedding. 25/03/21 12:00:52	5

	Man Behoofing Badly 23/03/21 8:16:24	5

	Unrequilted love 12/03/21 20:19:52	5

	Dreadlochs 11/03/21 8:05:41	5

	A groom with a view 09/03/21 20:00:07	1 5
A view more of these and they'll have to put me in a room (that's padded). --Willie Johnson
	Officer Dribble 09/03/21 8:22:37	5

	"How's Pegasus going?" "I'm just winging it." 08/03/21 12:22:28	2 5

	"Looks like the tide's not the only thing that's rising." 02/03/21 12:58:09	5

	Gland ahoy! 02/03/21 12:15:13	5

	Bag and bone man 28/02/21 8:33:15	5

	Bruce Banner 27/02/21 20:58:29	5

	Notsoserena Williams 26/02/21 12:04:07	5

	Staff at Sunnybank Rest Home finally receive some PPE. 20/02/21 8:08:58	5

	Cornered beef 16/02/21 20:00:49	2 5
Blast, I was a minute late and missed my chance to reuse my old joke from 2018 ( www.caption.me/461919 ). Here's a vote and a tip of my hat to you. :^)Crunchy --Crunchy Chords
	Bipolar bear 06/02/21 20:10:30	5

	creative WWTF 05/02/21 14:22:57	5

	Supperman 05/02/21 12:00:05	5

	Shame of Thrones 01/02/21 12:12:24	5

	creative Kitty Kitty Bang Bang 30/01/21 21:24:37	5

	I wish I could think of an emu-sing pun. 28/01/21 12:24:32	1 5

	"Dave, how's the turkey doing darling? Everyone's arriving for Christmas dinner in half an hour. Oh, you did remember to take it out of the freezer last night didn't you?" "Course I remembered love. It'll be ready, don't worry." 25/01/21 22:11:18	5

	"What I want to know is, how did that bloody cat get the superglue?" 20/01/21 8:22:54	1 5
Not only that, how did it apply it to the stick? --Willie Johnson
	"I thought I'd celebrate after having the Covid jab. Unfortunately I suffered severe slide effects." 09/01/21 12:29:57	5

	Capitol Thrill 07/01/21 21:18:58	5

	Makes a change from a zebra crossing. 01/01/21 12:36:56	5

	"Abandoned ship!" 29/12/20 20:13:55	5

	The 'How to strangle your annoying lockdown husband' class was going well. 23/12/20 20:03:41	5

	"Please tell me where I can find the labra-door." 11/12/20 12:50:57	5

	"I knew that bloody cat was up to something." 09/12/20 20:30:53	5

	"Sorry, there's been a mistake Bob. We meant to hire Dylan from the Magic Roundabout. Unless you're ok being paid in carrots." 05/12/20 12:13:55	5

	"You b*stard, I thought you said travelling at the speed of light would make me look younger." 25/11/20 20:40:43	5

	The duck stops here 23/11/20 12:01:04	5

	A true friend is one that tries not to fart in your face, even when they can. 23/11/20 9:14:26	5

	Big Bird 21/11/20 8:41:02	5

	Angry Bird 18/11/20 20:43:53	5

	clever The Prince and the Porker 17/11/20 12:00:11	5

	creative "Ok lads, remember the plan. As soon as the waiter's gone, we stop playing dead, overpower them and head for the sea. There's only two of them and seven of us. Oh, and well done Langou and Stine for jumping out of the pan and turning off the gas." 14/11/20 9:52:13	1 5

	Bradley Waggins 09/11/20 8:34:14	5

	His bike's worse than his bark 09/11/20 8:05:06	5

	BMRex 09/11/20 8:00:40	5

	Unfortunately, shortly after Percy discovered his first stash of gold coins, an elephant seal mistook him for a rival and flattened him. 03/11/20 12:21:05	5

	Lard of the Pings 03/11/20 12:00:09	5

	"He's my Lidl brother." 28/10/20 12:00:05	5

more captions

last comments (total: 1272)

While the pun is highly appropriate, this isn't a caption.

[anon]

28/09/24
10:29am

comment on caption:
The Orifice [Stephen Bean]

I agree it's more of a craption.

(caption author)

29/09/24
7:37am

comment on caption:
The Orifice [Stephen Bean]

The 'Empire Apple' strikes back.

[anon]

07/10/24
7:38pm

comment on caption:
Guardians of the Gala-xy [Stephen Bean]

"Beam me up, Scooty.
(Scooty's Gourmet Apples.)

[anon]

07/10/24
8:00pm

comment on caption:
Guardians of the Gala-xy [Stephen Bean]

and send them on a trip.

[anon]

09/10/24
7:20am

comment on caption:
Stoned the crows! [Stephen Bean]

Why is she afraid she'll get beaten?

Not in a domestic violence way, of course she could very well be the one doing the beating

In a captioning way of course, not with fists! 😂