	Last Week			All Time
	Quota	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank
Captions	59		1	#27	8126	22687	#8
Photos
Comments	18				342	360	#24
Forum Posts					4
Suggested Edits	6				5	6	#13

	Last Week		All Time
	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank
Captions			14341	#15
Photos			326	#45
Comments			213	#34
Forum Posts
Suggested Edits			5	#12

captions comments received captioned photos

captions

	Booby Trap 30/09/23 7:06:34	28

	creative x5 Step, Toe & Sun 12/03/14 12:37:33	28

	lol x3 Carol wished a double decker would come...and a Mars Bar, a Twix, a Bounty and a box of Terry's All Gold. 30/07/13 11:21:55	3 27
July's caption of the month, posted to the official caption.me Facebook page. Congrats! --Chris Beach
	lol x3 "You spoil that bloody bat!" 27/04/20 11:12:35	25

	lol clever x2 "Have you been mis-sold PPE?' 03/04/20 7:09:53	25

	lol x2 creative 'Been up since 4.am. Got a brilliant caption for the 8 a.m photo but I think it's gonna be a bit obvious. There's bound to be other captioneers thinking the same thing. I know, cut and paste. Oh five seconds to go. Finger hovering over add caption button...4..3 ..2 ZZZZZZZ ' 02/05/19 7:16:05	1 25

	clever x2 Pros and Cons 21/10/16 11:54:20	25

	Bruised Wayne 18/09/12 19:10:56	24

	lol x2 "Sorry to butt in, but has anybody seen my wheelchair?" 26/06/24 11:10:15, edited: 26/06/24 11:15:21	2 24
Really refreshing to see a narrative caption doing well, nice work Cap Auth. --James Lennox
	lol "Flippin' hell, Edmund, Who cares if it's creased? Just stick the flag in the bloody summit" 24/06/19 19:30:04	24

	lol Never try to leave a barbers without paying 01/07/21 11:19:39	3 23
Great caption Mark but I think Al Overy deserved a nod for being first to come up with the barber idea which hadn't occurred to me. --Stephen Bean

lol creative 01/10/18 19:04:56		20 23
I'm absolutely thrilled. Thanks to everyone for the votes and kind comments --Mark England
	lol x3 creative In his younger days, Don King had a fetish for licking squirrels arses 23/01/17 20:16:38	3 23
It's based on Don King's unique hairstyle --Mark England
	lol creative x2 Cuepid 27/08/13 19:01:41	23

	"The journey was so slow. It kept stopping at every lamp-post" 01/03/24 12:03:31	22

	lol x2 "Trek 300 miles across the plains in search of water? Fuck that I've just got a flight for £4.99 on Ryanair. Lands 10 minutes from the watering hole" 15/01/24 12:28:36	1 22
The flight is £4.99, but the extra weight over the standard limit will be another £4990. --Molly R
	lol The Scottish version of Knight Rider had a car called KILT. 06/11/23 8:12:43	1 22
Curious to see what's under the bonnet --Boycie
	lol creative "OK, I agree, people shouldn't pollute the sea with rubbish and plastic but you have to admit... this polystyrene has come in handy" 30/09/21 19:52:45	1 22
Pmsl --Karen Oakenfull
	lol Traffic news: The B345 has virtually come to a standstill due to Fogg 08/09/21 11:15:15	2 22
Around the M25 in 80 days. Sounds about right. --Dan Nicholls
	lol creative x2 Police arrange an identity parade for a woman who claims that she was being watched through a keyhole of a swimming pool changing room 22/10/18 19:44:22	22

	It's situated in a close knit community 15/02/17 20:06:24	22

	Booby Trapped 24/11/23 8:09:50	21

	lol "I swear if I catch you swinging past my daughter's bedroom again I'll...." 30/09/23 11:02:06, edited: 02/10/23 11:45:50, suggested edits	1 21

	lol "John and Paul. The tune's great but could we tweak the lyrics?" 13/09/23 19:03:13	21

	clever x3 No one is talking about the elephant in the room 30/05/22 7:44:43	21

	Even mutes can get Tourettes 18/05/21 11:17:50	1 21
Do sailors say clean things when they get Tourette's? --Willie Johnson
	Due to a bagpipe shortage, Luton's 'Scottish Exile Pipe Band' had to improvise 22/05/20 11:12:57	1 21
But it was a bit of a Wee Crankie idea. --Woofer 6
	"Good afternoon. Today, we are in Delhi, for the semi finals of the Extreme Jenga Championship.." 30/06/19 11:05:59	21

	"All I did was order a pint of cider" 02/04/16 19:05:57	21

	Lavish 06/05/23 7:00:54	20

	clever "Well done Dave. Now that's much better than your previous 'Grab the Cock' sign. 17/02/23 8:05:41	20

	clever x2 "Gotcha. Caught red-handed. Have you anything to say?" "Miaow" 28/06/21 11:39:48	20

	lol clever The relationship ended when Gladys pulled a Mussel 13/04/21 19:45:32	20

	"Come on you two. Smoke break is over. Those chimneys ain't gonna clean themselves" 08/07/20 7:25:57	20

	Air Raid Sirens 05/05/20 19:11:08	20

	creative Rice wine made with fox? Those Japanese will eat anything! 22/03/18 12:09:42	20

	lol x2 "My nose is running" "So is the fucking groom.... DAVE!" 24/11/13 20:20:38	1 20
lmfao...bravo. --Ross Davidson
	"Take me to your weeder" 19/09/12 7:01:41	4 20

	Like a Wine Stoned Cowboy 06/09/12 11:10:26	20

	8 out of 10 cats prefer Whiskeys 23/08/24 19:03:33, edited: 23/08/24 19:10:23, suggested edits	1 19

	"I'm fed up with this. Can't we just buy a lemon squeezer?" 11/06/24 19:03:36, edited: 11/06/24 19:04:45	19

	Dave Laboured away putting up his Christmas decorations, while Tracy was a bit more Conservative 07/01/24 12:09:11	1 19

	Thinks "These humans must be vicious, they're all muzzled" 18/10/23 19:05:54	19

	lol x2 creative "Get a grip Dave, it's just a fucking Squirrel" 26/08/23 11:09:32	5 19
Feel free to experiment on any of my captions, Dave --Vivvy En
	lol "Next on Animal Life Swap, we'll see how the Hippos are managing in their bedsit in Swansea" 07/09/21 7:14:09	2 19

	lol "You're smiling now but you'll regret getting them done when you're older" remarked his dad with his Tandy, Blockbuster Video, Rumbelows, Do It All, Texas, and Woolworths tattoos. 27/02/21 20:39:51	3 19
Great thinking on this one. Love it --The Wolf
	It was at that moment that the magician wished he had used a rabbit 07/07/20 7:03:05	19

	lol "Hello, I'm Dr Ball. How many mushrooms have you swallowed?" 30/04/20 7:27:16	19

	lol Some Paralympic events simply do not work 09/04/20 7:35:58	1 19
I hate myself, but I can't stop laughing at this. --James Lennox
	lol "I got rid of that frog in my throat, but I'm still a little hoarse" 16/08/19 11:04:54	19

	"I found it in the road. It's a 'Truck-killed flattypuss'" 19/09/18 7:53:27	19

	clever They lead up to A Flat 07/02/17 12:13:01	19

	lol "I want peanuts, a size 48 tutu and some sticky buns....or I drop the boy" 10/05/15 11:16:55	4 19
in your opinion. --Lucky Elperro
	"I see Spiderman was pissed again last night" 05/04/15 11:00:58	19

	lol x2 "Good man, you got the razor blade. Now let's see how cute the meerkat looks without ears" 11/07/14 20:00:38	1 19
Is it just me, or this the best round of captions in ages? I love this. --Michael Winner
	Gerbal Tea 05/07/14 11:19:27	19

	"Run Forrest Run" 24/03/14 20:16:35	19

	George was hoping to make the Olympus diving team 26/01/14 10:37:47	19

	Raveheart 05/10/12 11:08:49	19

	"Steak and Kidney £2, Mince Beef £1.50 and Cheese and Ham £1" Pie rates of the Caribbean 29/08/12 11:52:52	19

	Walkies with dinosaurs 25/04/14 11:07:08	18

	Ok. No need to Ramadan our throats 31/08/12 11:14:25	18

	Only pools and horses 28/08/12 11:44:28	18

	clever He snuffed it 30/10/24 12:00:38	18

	"What a dilemma" thought Dave. Sitting there with his Arachnophobia, a carton of milk, a spoon and a box of Crunchy Nut Cornflakes. 25/05/24 7:17:26, suggested edits	4 18
Suggested edit just tweaks the punchline, Cap Auth. I like it as it is regardless. --James Lennox
	lol x2 Even though he was sweating his nuts off in the dog suit, Dave would do anything to avoid paying the train fare. 18/10/23 19:02:35	18

	Filly O Fish 18/10/23 11:09:48	18

	Fanny By Gaslight 05/01/23 8:23:00	18

	"...and no funny business" 13/09/21 7:05:29	1 18
It's a clown so that's a given. --Barrie Bullock
	Water Canon 07/07/21 11:22:43	18

	"It might look cute, but the "African Pygmy Piranha Dog' just takes 30 seconds to take down and skin an adult zebra.." 21/08/20 11:09:41	18

	Mary had a little lamb It ran into a pylon 10,000 volts shot up its arse And turned its wool to nylon 17/08/20 7:54:46	2 18
Shocking --John Glover
	lol "It's sore?. Well I told you to stick to the italian, but no, you had to go and eat the Indian" 19/08/19 8:37:25	18

	lol "You spoil that bloody hamster" 30/03/19 8:06:50	18

	Isle of Nan TT 28/08/18 11:07:39	18

	lol Are you constipated? Is your toilet full of overgrown flowers? Then you could do with a prune. 07/02/15 20:29:27	18

	clever 🎵 It's such a purrfect day... 25/09/24 19:08:26	17

	I've always wondered how she gets that parting in her hair. 13/09/24 11:09:42	17

	lol x2 Most people are surprised when they see the inner workings of a robot 15/08/24 11:17:30	17

	lol "...Then we collect the slobber, bottle it up, and sell it as White Lightning" 08/08/24 11:07:13, edited: 08/08/24 11:09:00	2 17
That's surely not a cider monkey? --NotAsFunnyAsYourMum
	Talk about flogging a dead horse 17/04/24 11:01:41	17

	clever 🎵 Tiers on my pillow 25/02/24 20:03:31	17

	...and that morning his poor little daughter got into trouble for going to school with bullets, a service rifle and a Swiss Army knife. 25/07/23 19:29:09	17

	That black masking tape is gonna hurt when they pull it off. 26/06/23 11:03:32	17

	You think that's big? Look at the size of the Brussel Sprouts behind her 18/02/23 12:09:40	17

	lol I've always thought that alien abductions would be more high-tech 11/07/22 11:07:35	17

	lol "Sir, do you mind running through it again?" 22/06/21 11:05:16	1 17
"Do you mind running through the halls naked and screaming? Yes you do mind? Then do you mind if I do it after a question like that?" --Willie Johnson
	"Blimey your dog is reading that book. That's amazing" "Not really, he's supposed to be studying for his police exam" 28/05/21 11:17:19	17

	The lower sign is for constipated bats 08/04/21 7:08:47	17

	creative Abandoned as a pup, Fido was raised by a family of beavers 20/01/21 8:26:26	17

	creative "The cat walked straight past. The disguise worked" 01/12/20 11:28:19	17

	clever Con Heir 23/03/20 20:02:36	17

	Sealicone implants 13/03/20 20:08:04	2 17

	lol "So how will I recognise you?" 24/11/19 21:01:22	17

	"Well, I told you not to pull its tail" 16/11/17 20:27:03	1 17
Anon. As itâ€™s panto season you missed â€˜Oooohâ€™ from the start of your comment --Mr Dome
	Blob the Builder 03/10/17 19:00:51	1 17
...specializing in REALLY HEAVY construction. --Greg Curtis
	lol "Don't roll your eyes at me" 27/08/17 19:08:24	17

	lol x2 "You spoil that bloody Dingo" 01/04/15 20:51:15	1 17
must be me but its a bit sick! --Bad Boy Dennis.
	clever x2 Japanory 25/09/14 11:05:16	17

	creative x2 After successfully choreographing the Y.M.C.A dance, the dancers found that D.I.V.O.R.C.E by Tammy Wynette was harder to master. 15/05/14 19:24:32	17

more captions

last comments (total: 578)

I quite liked the AdventuresWithDad photos. I thought he was well fit! 😘

Karyn Harrison

13/10/23
11:38am

comment on caption:
Bloody Hell Captioneers. We had a bullet meal photo on Saturday. Seriously, how did this get voted up? I hope bullet meal photos are not the new cats. [Mark England]

Curious to see what's under the bonnet

Boycie

06/11/23
12:32pm

comment on caption:
The Scottish version of Knight Rider had a car called KILT. [Mark England]

Anyone stopping here... will be Rivetted to their seats.

[anon]

10/11/23
12:46pm

comment on caption:
For a sitting Tennant? [Mark England]

I'd be wary because if Goldilocks is a thieving bastard she's more than likely lifted the boat without asking permission so whenever Baby Bear returns to shore depending who the boat belongs to, he might find himself mounted on a wall.

They might also be displeased with the mess that's left in the boat unless he throws Goldilocks overboard and drowns her but either which way he'll either look like he's stolen the boat completely by himself or that he's a savage bear with parts of Goldilock's mutiliated corpse and body fluids strewn about the boat.

Really Baby Bear should have thought this plan through 😱