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| This Week | All Time | ||||||
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| Quota | Added | Score | Rank | Added | Score | Rank | |
| Comments | 3 | 1 | #4 | 291 | 595 | #17 | |
| Captions | 10 | 8040 | 21315 | #11 | |||
| Photos | |||||||
| Forum Posts | 12 | ||||||
| Suggested Edits | 2 | ||||||
| This Week | All Time | |||
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Voted | Rank | Voted | Rank | |
| Comments | 683 | #13 | ||
| Captions | 9833 | #26 | ||
| Photos | 1137 | #19 | ||
| Forum Posts | ||||
| Suggested Edits | 3 | #13 | ||
captions
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26/10/23 11:26:57, edited: 15/03/24 18:25:47 |
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Many thanks, Captioneers, for your votes and kind and funny words. I'm chuffed to bits that many of you liked the caption, and hats off to those who narrowly missed out. Big shout out as always to Mr Beach for providing the platform for us to be crea --The Wolf
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18/06/19 19:00:13 |
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Wow! I can't believe I've won, such a nice surprise! Thank you very much for the votes and kind words. Also thanks to Chris for picking the caption but most importantly for giving us the site! It's a privilege to be on the board and a pleasure ... --The Wolf
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11/12/23 8:02:05 |
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11/03/20 8:00:13 |
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Thank you very much for your votes and kind words. There were some great captions this month so feel very fortunate to win the top prize. I've always found Caption.me a great and fun distraction from the otherwise stressful day to day of life. Th... --The Wolf
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04/03/24 12:37:26 |
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Why didn't my daughter ever bring hot blokes like that home? --Karen McDonald
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"I bought mine from 'Cheapknockoffcoats.com', you?" 23/11/23 8:17:42 |
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If it applies, I'd say this. I was in a similar position to Al and Karen where I didn't have enough super votes to vote up a caption. Karyn was kind enough to give me 20 super votes which I then returned to her but used a supe --Glyn Evans
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17/11/23 9:04:41 |
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"Guys, I have a busy morning. Are you interested in buying the house or not?" 13/11/23 20:09:22 |
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14/01/21 12:10:07 |
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10/11/20 8:00:16 |
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Many thanks to you all for your votes and kind words. Additional thanks to Chris for providing and maintaining the site and for choosing me for this month's winner. This was one of those captions which I nearly didn't post because I thought it w... --The Wolf
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Dear Santa. For Christmas this year I'd love some thermal underpants. 05/10/20 19:27:23 |
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"Mum, there's still no sign of Santa." 16/09/23 19:03:37 |
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"Tony, why is there a shit in the sink?" 11/09/23 11:03:27 |
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Interflora has really gone downhill. 04/09/23 7:16:28 |
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"THIS IS THE POLICE. PULL OVER, GET OUT OF THE VAN AND SPREAD 'EM." 02/04/23 19:37:25, edited: 02/04/23 19:48:48 |
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He should start doing donuts as a distraction --KimJong Pun
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"Dad said I couldn't make a rocket out of the fairy liquid bottle until it was empty." 22/11/23 8:03:07 |
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"I need to lose weight. My diet has been rubbish lately." 10/11/23 8:09:22 |
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02/11/23 20:05:15 |
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Scuba diving lessons for men - SOLD OUT 01/11/23 8:03:00, edited: 01/11/23 8:31:30 |
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It was such a shame when Quaker Oats went bust. 26/10/23 19:12:53 |
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"Cheers mate. It's difficult to scratch your bollocks with these gloves on." 13/10/23 19:13:59 |
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Half an hour he's been on those tits now. My Dad's got one hell of an appetite. 22/09/23 11:00:24 |
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"How many do you smoke a day?" 10/09/23 11:03:55 |
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"We're a bit overdressed for dogging." 30/01/23 8:12:45 |
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"Wow! The people in the upstairs flat have got a powerful hoover." 03/12/22 8:00:07 |
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Doing the Hoover hover. --Willie Johnson
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F-cking typical. NOW she's in the mood. 01/02/22 8:35:06 |
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04/05/21 19:14:26 |
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"JANET, JUST LEAVE IT, WE'LL BUY ANOTHER LILO" 23/11/20 20:01:37 |
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23/07/20 11:24:05 |
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28/03/20 20:10:40 |
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"I'm sorry for yawning but I find your company really boring" 12/06/19 11:25:47 |
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Filming has begun for the highly anticipated new period drama 05/06/19 7:10:30 |
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Dave and Lucy were inconsolable after witnessing their Corgi being drowned by a random Alsatian. 04/03/23 9:39:08 |
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02/12/21 12:00:09 |
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Wow, what a nice surprise. Thanks for all of your kind words and for all the fun and silliness. And thanks to Chris for providing our creative caption world and for choosing me as the winner. Happy new year to everyone. Let's have a good one. --The Wolf
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27/06/21 19:29:49 |
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03/04/20 11:00:39 |
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Being a first responder to a car accident on the Simpsons was a sobering experience"¦ 02/04/20 11:00:09 |
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Looks like he's covered in Marge. --Karyn Harrison
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01/12/19 20:00:06 |
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16/09/19 19:00:05 |
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08/08/19 19:44:45 |
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24/04/19 11:51:55 |
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You should always check the small print before booking a cheap all inclusive holiday. 21/10/23 11:03:17 |
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"I don't have time for this shit." 12/10/23 11:26:04 |
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10/10/23 7:03:26 |
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23/03/23 20:00:40 |
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Given all the formaldehyde I'm actually picturing Nan as the pickle. --James Lennox
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08/12/22 20:00:11 |
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It's always good to keep your distance from a potential carrier. 28/11/21 20:00:14 |
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Well done The Wolf - great caption --Mr Dome
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"And this is your loft access" 22/04/21 19:00:14 |
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"The finish line please driver. I just can't be arsed today." 19/04/21 11:06:37 |
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Can't be horsed today. --Willie Johnson
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18/05/19 11:00:06 |
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She lit up my life. --James Lennox
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08/12/23 12:34:17, edited: 08/12/23 12:37:51 |
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"...and my Wife STILL wanted the f*cking heating on" 30/11/23 12:12:30 |
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"..and then I had a shit in the woods." 23/11/23 12:05:30 |
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easyJet will NOT tolerate rudeness to cabin crew. 17/09/23 19:02:07 |
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09/03/23 20:03:56 |
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"Terry's Mum is a silly billy. Pass it on." 13/02/23 12:01:31 |
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It's scary when you see the inside of a Ryanair cockpit. 17/12/22 20:00:14 |
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"Is it me or is it chilli in here?" 16/11/22 12:17:59 |
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17/11/21 12:29:53 |
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I must protest at this slur on my character and personal hygiene --John Llamas
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"I wish that broccoli would hurry up in the bog" 25/06/21 11:07:09 |
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Staff at NASA are in shock after receiving the latest images from the Mars Rover. 24/06/21 7:07:19 |
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"Have you got any change for the fruit machine?" 04/02/21 20:06:02 |
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Great caption: You dropped us into a story. Please continue: I want to know more about this poor fellow... --Greg Curtis
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28/06/19 19:13:37 |
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"Errrr, Dad. Our Zoom call is still connected..." 02/04/24 12:52:22 |
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08/01/24 12:26:18 |
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"If I'd known the dogs would miss Dave this much I would've had him cremated." 27/11/23 20:26:37 |
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"I'd like to thank everyone in the audience for coming." 14/11/23 20:31:50 |
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Not even going to try to beat that hahah --Dale McPhail
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19/10/23 11:05:32 |
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16/10/23 7:20:42 |
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"I don't know about you, Ling, but I've got a monumental headache." 11/10/23 19:17:02 |
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Their temples are throbbing. --Dave Bryan
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"Your turn to change the litter tray." 01/09/23 7:05:27 |
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"Mum, the social worker is here..." 06/06/23 11:01:52 |
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“OH JEEZUS…TURN IT OFF! I told you the kids weren’t old enough to load the washing machine.” 22/05/23 11:00:16 |
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11/03/23 20:00:16 |
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30/01/22 13:14:36 |
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Bill Rockwell fined by authorities for graffitiing. 21/06/21 7:10:45 |
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18/06/21 7:38:43 |
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14/05/21 7:00:16 |
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Looks like they're about to tie the knot. 10/05/21 11:01:06 |
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18/04/21 11:47:00 |
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Paul was beginning to regret buying the world's heaviest earring. 08/01/21 12:34:53 |
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The helium in his left shoe wasn't helping either. --Willie Johnson
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18/11/20 12:00:08 |
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Let's hope they don't start making advent calendars... 04/04/20 19:03:05 |
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01/04/20 19:01:20 |
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Pissed in the bath? Don't worry, we all have... 17/02/20 21:25:05 |
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I haven't pissed in her bath, not wanting to be the odd one out, what's her address? --John Glover
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The frog version of Basic Instinct was a little weird. 17/02/20 12:03:52 |
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10/08/19 9:18:45 |
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25/01/19 8:01:36 |
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"LET'S MAKE AMERICA GRATE AGAIN" 21/12/18 12:47:04 |
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Have you ever wondered why roadworks take so long? 29/11/23 8:02:14 |
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06/10/23 11:02:11 |
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I don't know how you found me, you must have a very special set of skills. However I would say that this picture was taken a while ago as I've put on weight since --Glyn Evans
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"Oh you're back. How was your first day working at Subway?" 14/06/23 11:08:58 |
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This is the first time I've wanted to have 5 a day. 31/03/23 11:00:10 |
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16/01/21 12:02:34 |
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In the past I've had the good fortune to work with Attenborough's sound recordist Chris Watson, and have actually heard this exact recording that he made. He also puts microphones into the carcass of zebras to get recordings of vultures tearing ... --Michael Winner
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26/11/20 12:39:34 |
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03/11/20 12:12:22 |
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03/04/20 19:00:25 |
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Lots of time at home, unlimited porn and no toilet roll. What could possibly go wrong... 30/03/20 19:00:10 |
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"Good evening Prince Andrew. Your usual?" 22/12/19 12:02:15 |
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03/11/19 20:00:07 |
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email us
You beat me to it.
11:56pm
comment on caption:
"Hello students and welcome to your virtual sex education class on Zoom. To the left of me is Katie, my assistant for this presentation. Now, the first thing I'd like to point out is my penis which is currently in sleepy mode. This would look very different if Katie had bigger tits as displayed in the top left of your screen. These tits have strips of tape on them which some people like. Below them is the sphincter which has been enlarged and clearly shows it in 'undisturbed mode'. A smaller version of this is underneath with an arrow pointing to a pricking device which ultimately leads to different sphincter sizes ranging from small to that of an Essex girl which is displayed on the far bottom left." [The Wolf]
Careful not to remove the tape too quickly (ouch!).
12:30am
comment on caption:
"Hello students and welcome to your virtual sex education class on Zoom. To the left of me is Katie, my assistant for this presentation. Now, the first thing I'd like to point out is my penis which is currently in sleepy mode. This would look very different if Katie had bigger tits as displayed in the top left of your screen. These tits have strips of tape on them which some people like. Below them is the sphincter which has been enlarged and clearly shows it in 'undisturbed mode'. A smaller version of this is underneath with an arrow pointing to a pricking device which ultimately leads to different sphincter sizes ranging from small to that of an Essex girl which is displayed on the far bottom left." [The Wolf]
Growing up in East London I knew this as a Dutch oven. Any other names from different regions?
7:35pm
comment on caption:
It doesn't matter where you are, making your wife smell one of your farts just isn't the same without a duvet. [The Wolf]
"virtual sex education class on Zoom" - led by Jeffrey Toobin.
7:37am
comment on caption:
"Hello students and welcome to your virtual sex education class on Zoom. To the left of me is Katie, my assistant for this presentation. Now, the first thing I'd like to point out is my penis which is currently in sleepy mode. This would look very different if Katie had bigger tits as displayed in the top left of your screen. These tits have strips of tape on them which some people like. Below them is the sphincter which has been enlarged and clearly shows it in 'undisturbed mode'. A smaller version of this is underneath with an arrow pointing to a pricking device which ultimately leads to different sphincter sizes ranging from small to that of an Essex girl which is displayed on the far bottom left." [The Wolf]
Sorry for not voting Wolfie, I forgot I had 1 hour less to vote for this caption. You had me in stitches.
5:57pm
comment on caption:
How your cat would react if for some reason a fat strange man forced his way down your chimney... [The Wolf]
Apologies again Wolfie, because of the clocks changing I again missed out on voting for one of your captions. A stroke of genius to see the photo in this way.
6:00pm
comment on caption:
"Ok madam, you should be fine now. Please chew your food properly next time" [The Wolf]
Thanks for your kind words Stephen (for this and the other caption). The clocks always throw me off too don't worry! I'm banned from captioning this week by my wife because it's half term and she's a teacher so we are having 'nice days out together'. I'll try sneak on for an occasional caption and to vote as much as possible though. Happy captioning! :)
8:04pm
comment on caption:
"Ok madam, you should be fine now. Please chew your food properly next time" [The Wolf]
Glad you're having some quality time mate. I'm in awe of your captions. The number of times you manage to work on an idea I gave up on with such artistry. Whatever job you do, I hope they use that creative mind of yours to the full.
8:31pm
comment on caption:
"Ok madam, you should be fine now. Please chew your food properly next time" [The Wolf]
Haha thanks again mate and I think the same about you and other captioneers. Many times I'll struggle and then someone comes up with something brilliant. That's the best thing about the site I think. Ps. I'm a Health and Safety consultant so my creativity is restricted these days to Caption.me!
9:02pm
comment on caption:
"Ok madam, you should be fine now. Please chew your food properly next time" [The Wolf]
Well that explains everything Wolf. I always find the things Health and Safety consultants say hilarious.
9:14pm
comment on caption:
"Ok madam, you should be fine now. Please chew your food properly next time" [The Wolf]