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	This Week				Last Week			All Time
	Quota	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank
Captions	40	28	96	#2	6	7	#26	8157	14684	#19
Photos			1	#7				4	12	#19
Comments	13	1	2	#8				134	231	#35
Forum Posts		3						7
Suggested Edits	2

	This Week		Last Week		All Time
	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank
Captions	28	#15	8	#24	5633	#43
Photos					510	#37
Comments					194	#35
Forum Posts
Suggested Edits	1	#2			3	#14

captions comments received captioned photos

captions


lol x7 creative x5 clever x3 13/03/19 12:20:20		39 53
So that's why she had a sore throat.. --stone face

lol x3 14/02/24 12:09:41, edited: 15/03/24 18:16:30		20 32
Congrats, Chris! That was a pitch-perfect caption. :^) Crunchy --Crunchy Chords

lol creative clever x3 04/03/22 12:00:30		22 31
Well done Chris , now get off and let someone else have a go. --Tony S
	lol To date, 12 Scotsmen have tragically died attempting to get the pound coin. 04/02/23 12:19:17, edited: 04/02/23 14:25:21	2 30


lol x2 creative 22/04/23 8:08:57, edited: 01/06/23 10:11:47		18 29
Well done, Chris. Now you can get absolutely smashed. --Dave Bryan
	"Yep, honest to God, in some countries I'm the starter and you're the main" 20/03/23 20:09:24	29

	“That’s lovely Santa, but I was actually hoping for a shirt” 18/04/23 12:03:57	25

	creative ʇsɐⅎ ooʇ ɹǝuɹoɔ ʇɐɥʇ uǝʞɐʇ ǝʌɐɥ ʎɐɯ noʎ ʞuᴉɥʇ I ʻǝʌɐᗡ 11/04/23 12:00:28	25

	When Dave couldn’t find a charging point he used his initiative. 10/03/23 12:00:21	24

	"Come on officer, I was only doing a fraction over" 17/09/18 12:00:08	24

	The final episode of Peppa Pig 02/11/17 8:14:09	24

	Dave's put on a few stones. Mon 12:04:38, edited: Mon 12:05:01	23

	clever The other side reads - Told you so. 29/08/24 12:03:30	23


lol x2 27/10/21 12:06:41		20 23
Hi all, many thanks for all your kind comments and votes, I'm in bits! I recently took some time off the site however the rehab clearly didn't work and it's great to be back transfixed to my phone in dark corridors with my fellow captionoholics... --Chris Keegan
	creative clever x3 Convenience food. 21/04/19 14:14:53	23

	When I suddenly saw this in the road I had to break fast. 05/03/19 8:00:15	22

	creative clever "I'll have the table cloth please" 10/02/19 9:57:28	2 22
This was a tough pic. Well done. --James Lennox
	clever No wonder it's tired, it came in at twenty to one. 16/12/18 12:00:20	1 22
I find it odd. --Scrappy Doo
	lol x2 Stand up comic 15/04/18 20:04:11	22

	lol "Did you see the game last night?" - "No, I fell asleep watching it" 12/08/24 12:05:19	1 21
Good one. Look at them all: one, two, three [SNORE]... --Greg Curtis
	lol BREAKING: Doctors are accused of not taking strike action seriously. 11/04/23 20:00:13	21

	The economy has seriously hit the restaurant trade with many having to reduce the size of their kitchen staff. 16/10/21 20:03:34	21

	Cash test dummies 12/05/19 20:21:22	21

	"Borrow the car? Oh Philip, you do make one laugh sometimes" 16/02/19 12:00:07	21

	"Darling, I think your mother may have fallen out of bed again" 18/03/23 12:01:19	20

	WARNING ⚠️ Look out for Crocs 19/10/22 8:02:42	20

	creative clever Dave landed 137 fish this morning, simply by pulling the plug out. 29/10/20 12:01:38	20

	clever x2 It's a studio apartment. 26/04/18 8:00:11	20

	'The only real problem I see is possibly getting a passport' 09/03/24 12:50:31	19

	Grimsby Council excels with festive tree feature 01/02/24 12:08:21	19

	Not for sail. 09/04/23 20:31:19	19

	"Isn't it dangerous?" - "It's a bit hairy coming down" 13/03/23 8:26:23, edited: 13/03/23 11:00:51	19

	lol x2 This is incredible , if you screw your eyes up, tilt your head slightly to one side and totally concentrate on the image, after about 5 minutes you'll feel a sharp slap on the back of the head and the missus screaming "you're not on that bloody caption thing again!" 14/01/20 12:17:31	2 19
That's a magic "Oi!" --Troompa Loompa
	lol "Darling, when I suggested putting a Garland in the window I was actually thinking of something a bit more Christmassy" 06/12/19 12:00:49	19


lol 08/10/19 8:24:53		17 19
A genuine laugh out loud moment for me. Well done, Chris. By the way, I've heard the RSPCA will be paying you a visit later. --Vivvy En
	Jack Knickerless 24/06/19 12:54:05	19

	clever Panting by numbers 02/01/19 16:33:06	19

	"It's a lemon entry my dear Watson" 18/12/18 12:00:41	19

	Reader's Digest 17/12/18 20:00:10	19

	clever "Not tonight love, I've got a monumental headache" 29/11/18 12:02:47	1 19
"...mind if I grab your ASpirin?" --Greg Curtis
	您通常会有一个装配图和零件清单与该单元。花几分钟检查所有零件和固定装置是否存在且正确。没有什么比在整个过程中发现一两个螺丝丢失更糟糕的了。包装中还应包含一些组装工具所需的工具，例如内六角钥匙或星形钥匙（完成后，将工具放在安全的地方）。将所有固定件和小部件放在一侧或容器中（如塑料特百惠盒），以免它们“丢失”。在开始组装设备之前，请检查所有部件以确保它们处于良好状态，因为它们有时会在存储和交付过程中受到撞击。如果有任何作品被标记，则由您决定在退回该作品或继续进行方面采取什么行动。在拿起任何工具之前，请仔细阅读说明并从头到尾阅读它们，以便了解您将要遵循的过程。 13/07/22 12:02:16	3 18
nah I even googled translated this. And it's ACTUALLY instructions haha. --Hamish Michaels
	Apparently he gets through 2 packs a day. 23/09/21 12:00:07	18

	"Where's gran?" - "I think she popped out for a hare cut" 11/11/19 8:00:22	18

	Apparently it's a house full of squatters. 21/10/19 20:02:17	18

	lol "For goodness sake Colin, you and your bloody obsession for taking road kill home..." 26/09/19 8:05:13	1 18
Lol --The Wolf
	lol x2 Bob Dylan videos aren't what they used to be.. 06/06/19 9:23:56	18

	lol "I suppose a blue job is out of the question?" 03/06/19 22:16:27	18

	Happy hour wasn't going well. 11/03/19 12:09:06	18

	The Hound of Music 17/12/18 8:02:21	18

	Took the mother in law out last night. First punch. 30/09/18 20:11:16	18

	lol And I'm fryer tuck! 26/02/18 20:02:46	18

	creative I don't usually do the dogs but I put a monkey on this one 23/02/18 20:11:31	18

	"WAIT LADS! VAR have disallowed it!" 20/03/24 20:54:35	1 17
Ten minutes after the goal. --Al Overy
	Looks like a nice port. 21/02/23 12:00:16	3 17
In Cork? --KimJong Pun
	I see beer's going up again 18/02/23 9:47:59	17

	Welcome to Bettersea Dogs Home. 09/02/23 8:06:12, edited: 09/02/23 8:38:32	17

	Later that evening George couldn’t wait to tear off her knickers , they were killing him. 08/04/22 9:07:45	17

	Wicky Leaks 30/05/19 8:00:10	17

	creative He's a sh*t guitarist, but you should see him playing tennis 04/05/19 15:48:55	1 17
Love this --Mr Dome
	creative The firing squad clearly have a sense of humour. 11/04/19 12:34:28	17

	clever Beach trampolines - Â£5 for 5 minutes. Warning - Do not exceed your time. 06/04/19 9:06:37	17

	clever It looks like Jones has scored. 11/03/19 8:06:13	17

	"And would Sir like aperitif to go with your meal?" 19/11/18 20:01:18	17

	Staff bullying should not be tolerated 15/10/18 12:00:12	17

	clever Once again Gary was keen to illustrate how we are just one tiny part of the galaxy 29/06/18 21:21:07	17

	"Darling, did you remember to bath the kids and let the cats out?" - "SHIT!" 12/06/24 12:24:20	16

	Meanwhile, the weather in Manchester improved so much you could actually see the top of benches. 31/05/23 12:11:11	16

	Hi all, So many thanks for attending our first ever get together, it was fantastic to actually meet all of you. Framed prints of the attached are available online, please note there is an additional charge of £2 for the colour option. All the best, Chris Beach. 18/10/21 20:00:24	16

	lol I spent most of the 80's listening to The Wall. 06/02/21 18:33:44	9 16
I preferred listening to the Doors. --Karyn Harrison
	"What was the sell by date on those eggs love?" 04/12/20 12:09:49	1 16
"Don't worry, we've still got two days left." --Willie Johnson
	From this moment onwards Tina stopped playing on trampolines. 06/07/20 20:15:34	1 16

	When the coffee shops eventually reopened Rex could only reminisce over his 6 daily walks. 09/05/20 14:04:36	1 16

	Madame Tussauds reveal waxwork commissioned by The White House. So far it has successfully attended 2 summits, 1 state occasion and a banquet without saying anything stupid. 30/08/19 10:57:08	1 16
Boris Johnson places an order. --Molly R
	lol It was the Gillette condoms which gave me serious grief. 28/08/19 12:04:49	16

	clever x3 Julie was beginning to regret buying her bras from Amazon. 04/06/19 22:19:52	16

	Darling, could you just put the landing light on? 22/03/19 20:04:26	16

	clever Global warming - It turns out the butler did it. 19/11/18 12:00:10	16

	clever Don't you just hate it when things from Amazon are left outside? 13/10/18 9:11:35	16

	Further tests reveal smoking definitely stunts growth 11/10/18 8:00:50	16

	Darling, have you seen my Good Housekeeping mag anywhere? 09/08/18 8:09:35	16

	"Darling, just to let you know, I'm bringing someone back for dinner tonight" 06/08/18 12:00:20	16

	Black Friday and the wife is spending the whole bloody day online"¦. 24/11/17 12:16:43	16

	The Sea of Tranquility. 01/07/23 20:29:29	15

	creative "Rex has fallen in!" - "NEVERMIND" 22/05/23 12:01:07	1 15

	Dave originally thought dating a captioner would be fun. 03/05/23 8:30:48	15

	lol "What do you remember about falling down the stairs?" - "LEFT, CAUTION, MOBILE PHONES, WATCH, LEFT, CAUTION, MOBILE PHONES, WATCH, LEFT, CAUTION, MOBILE...." 23/04/23 12:34:05, edited: 23/04/23 13:16:15	1 15

	lol Sue threw Dave out 6 months ago. She seriously regrets not using the front door. 12/04/23 20:02:31	15

	lol "Love, you won't believe what I saw today, only a squirrel with a stall selling plastic flowers" - "HAVE YOU BEEN ON THAT FU@KING CAPTION SITE AGAIN!" 11/03/23 20:57:44	15

	clever “Have you considered changing your name, Neil?” 02/11/22 12:05:10	15

	Wok T F ?? 24/10/22 8:10:16	15

	creative "Dave, you've got to help, the neighbours have put up magnetic wall paper!" 17/10/22 20:00:29	15

	Major Tom 06/06/22 8:00:10	15

	lol "Are you OK to hold madam, I've got one or two others waiting for the meter reading department" 01/04/22 8:22:35	15

	The wife spends most of her day laying in the bath 03/03/22 12:11:33	15

	Rex just loves a serious dog fight. 03/12/21 20:00:08	1 15
I bet he'll shoot down the Red Setter Baron --Glyn Evans
	clever The Cattle of Hastings. 10/10/21 9:46:35	15

	"I really don't know where he got it from but it's everytime he's about to take off he's got to point out the emergency exits" 19/09/20 9:18:07	15

	lol Brothels open up again, but you'll need more than a condom. 25/07/20 13:33:54	15

	Consequently Sharon hasn't lost any knickers off the line in weeks 17/06/20 12:28:22	1 15
Dirty bitch hasn't washed any that's why. --Morgan .
	Drowning Street 27/05/20 12:06:12	15

more captions

last comments (total: 467)

The Tories try to rebrand inflation.

Mark Cowling

08/10/22
11:15pm

comment on caption:
Liz Truss denies her plans for us to ride out inflation are beyond fantasy. [Chris Keegan]

I considered a Sunak caption but wanted something that would still be relevant by the end of voting.

John Harrison

28/10/22
12:09pm

comment on caption:
Sunak continues to suggest everything’s fine. [Chris Keegan]

Maybe change to... it was taken last Christmas, not Summer 😁 and you get my vote. Ho ho ho

[anon]

03/11/22
8:46pm

comment on caption:
"And what exactly gave you cause for concern when you saw this photo of your family Mr Jones?"
- "Possibly because it was taken last Christmas while I was away and Jim's our postman" [Chris Keegan]

Donger Mouse

[anon]

08/11/22
11:46am

comment on caption:
Rex is clearly shocked by the size of Micky’s erection. [Chris Keegan]

He is turning a Triumph into a defeat!

[anon]

03/02/23
11:45am

comment on caption:
“Mate, getting in that will be a Triumph!” [Chris Keegan]

Yes, not long after Boris was jailed for Partygate after a public backlash. Even though the whole country were having house parties and breaking the same restrictions, it was important to make an example of the Conservative Party. I won't even go into Rishi not wearing a seatbelt. Nobody ever forgets to put on a seatbelt, do they? Especially when on a rollercoaster...

I agree with Nicola Sturgeon that when deciding what prison Boris should put into he should be treated as the partygater that he is.

I realise that female inmates are concerned that if put in a women's prison Boris might want to party with them as is his perceived partygating nature. That's why it's important that he should be kept in a male prison so that he only parties with men as is the status quo.

It's such a lovely gesture that men deserve to be partied with. They must get so lonely and need the company wink