best earliest latest latest and best captions

"Luke, it's no use trying to hide that lightsaber."

22/06/18 7:26:55

Ah, so that's why they're called nap sacks

09/06/18 13:49:36

A bolder sign is required

24/03/18 8:31:00

The Black-Eyed Frozen Peas

03/03/18 20:26:25

That moment when the Hotel Manager knocks and you're wearing a tablecloth you stole from the dining room at lunchtime

15/01/18 21:34:05

You can always spot a uni student coming home with a bag of dirty laundry and scabies

01/01/18 21:04:01

"What a sweetie and he looks just like his parents in the last photo"

24/12/17 20:12:48

I lav you too

08/12/17 8:11:09

"It's not heavy, just put your back into it."

01/11/17 8:36:44

"That looks heavy, let me give you a hand."

01/11/17 8:26:54

On holiday Doctor Foster and his family were somewhat underwhelmed with the quality of the puddles

14/10/17 20:55:37

Don't roll your eyes at me!

13/10/17 19:20:20

'Yes, Darling, I do know where the sheets and curtains are. I'll explain later.'

05/10/17 19:40:07

"Hoskins, you're fired. I asked for a big promotional handout."

15/09/17 20:04:04

"Sashay through the park and give me a sexy backwards glance like this, OK?"

29/08/17 7:45:15

"Come on, I've been waiting here a pharaoh while."

22/08/17 7:59:39

lol

Spider's phrenology classes proved worthwhile after a detailed cranial examination revealed he was indeed in the grip of an utter maniac

16/08/17 9:17:04

"Kids today have no table manners"

04/07/17 7:20:24

"There's Ivy, Fern and... oh, hello Vera."

30/05/17 11:15:52

Dave worried that he had too much time on his stands

08/04/17 13:46:29

Dummy run

31/03/17 21:14:48

Arthur's car was up for sale. It was going for a song.

22/02/17 9:35:32

Dave may have looked a prat in his underwater gear but he won the Silhouette Competition with his mean devil shadow

13/02/17 8:25:18

It must be a catfish... It's in a litter tray!

03/01/17 20:51:05

The sign said: 'Keep To The Left And Hold On To The Rail'. What a naughty girl!

25/11/16 9:09:12

Gullp!

20/09/16 7:49:49

'I'm beginning to wish we hadn't picked up those scattered pallets on West Street!'

06/09/16 7:43:46

lol

'They'll never know I'm wearing pink lace panties under this lot!'

02/09/16 11:43:34

Carriage clock

14/12/24 21:03:06

Going buy-buys

28/11/24 20:26:27

"I'm a celebreadity! GET ME OUT OF HERE!"

23/11/24 12:22:32, edited: 23/11/24 12:32:14

Sacked from his line-painting job, Dave said "But zebra stripes aren't really straight".

17/10/24 7:14:35, edited: 17/10/24 7:16:38, suggested edits

Keep calm
Carrion smoking

09/10/24 7:19:28

clever

Where's the cat?

06/10/24 7:01:11

"Arrh!"
"Does it smell good?"
"Collar's a bit tight."

29/09/24 7:07:21, edited: 29/09/24 7:08:37

Body bag

28/09/24 7:23:00

🎵 I got the power 🎵

25/09/24 7:08:02

clever

"Don't worry about it, babe, we'll get you some lube."

18/09/24 7:15:25

...and that was the last time Dave ordered a draught.

06/09/24 7:35:07

You spoil that fish

23/08/24 7:42:16

"He's very warm and loves cuddles but he does tend to get stuck in the catflap," said Gladys.

11/08/24 11:12:39

"This is a rare photo of me with my uncle. I didn't see much of him because he always worked nights."

16/06/24 7:22:36

"What a delightful cottage. What's it made of?"
"Waterstones."

26/05/24 19:27:56

I want to be leafed alone

12/05/24 7:01:36, edited: 12/05/24 7:08:12

clever

"He's going off his rocker."

14/04/24 7:02:40

"My bun doesn't look big in this."

13/04/24 19:15:18

"I was surprised by this year's Pirelli calendar models."

09/04/24 7:30:59

"Gertrude, does my bum look big in this?"

09/04/24 7:15:32

lol

When you see the vet pulling his rubber glove on it's enough to give anyone the sh1ts

07/04/24 19:04:13, edited: 07/04/24 19:04:35

Don't shake or the can may explode with laughter

07/04/24 7:05:21

clever

"I think it's time for a piecemaker."

31/03/24 19:26:21

"I don't suppose you have it in duck egg blue?"

11/03/24 12:34:15

"...and you can buy the full set for a bargain price thus guaranteeing that in a few months time you'll have hours of fun hunting for the right lid."

22/02/24 20:10:20

"Buttons...you want chocolate buttons? They haven't got those at the bar, darlin', but I'll treat you to some pork scratchings or a pickled egg."

28/01/24 14:50:16, edited: 28/01/24 14:51:21

"You want PEDIGREE...? How rude! Get out NOW!"

16/12/23 8:49:21

You are what you eat

26/11/23 20:12:25

Knit balaclavas

04/11/23 8:14:20

"Hahahaha. So you just have to press the one button? We're not so different..."

10/10/23 19:28:57

"Have you ever had one of those days when your silk thread snaps and you're suddenly plunging to the ground but get caught by a street mime artist who won't let go until a passerby puts a coin in his hat?"

"No, me neither."

30/09/23 11:14:36

Pardon?

07/09/23 19:28:29

"I didn't realise you wanted all the soldiers too."

31/08/23 7:30:30

"I think it looks crap," remarked the armchair critic.

25/08/23 11:17:55

"...and we've just sold one to the Joneses."

25/07/23 7:32:48

"He always wakes up with a bad altitude."

14/07/23 11:45:13

"Can't stand the stuff, I wouldn't spend a penny on it."

03/06/23 13:00:51

"Oh Dave, you mitre tried harder."

28/05/23 19:05:08

Dave discovered he was doing approximately 400 knots an hour.

08/05/23 19:43:48

There are concerns that young Ivan spends too much time in the canteen.

26/04/23 11:12:36, edited: 26/04/23 11:12:52

"We seem to get pulled over less when she drives. I think it's cos I is black."

11/04/23 7:14:11

Everyone agreed that the fashion show had gone well, it all went off very smoothie.

31/03/23 11:14:44, edited: 31/03/23 14:47:10

One man went a long way to mow a meadow

25/03/23 8:00:25

"It's that lumpy Arsetex stuff."

18/03/23 12:09:19

Working for peanuts

11/03/23 20:01:05

For gentlemen with incontinence problems

04/03/23 12:09:27

Shake liberally over your fish dishes for that authentic taste of the sea.

22/02/23 20:28:39

"I'm sorry, Darling, but you'll have to walk this last bit. I don't want to get my car muddy."

30/01/23 8:16:08

Fiddling on the roof

23/01/23 20:17:16

Available in all disreputable chemists.

18/01/23 20:24:59

Pavlov's mogs

13/01/23 12:00:10

Chalk and... CHEEEESE!

09/01/23 12:43:03

"Call the Vet! She's got a splitting headache."

09/01/23 8:10:43

"Not a mess, Daddy. These are 'Go Faster' stripes."

04/01/23 8:26:04

"Apparently, side-effects of this drug include your hair turning green."

20/12/22 8:00:32

Jon was overcome with grief as he dispatched mother-in-law.

01/12/22 12:57:24

Hopeless! Where's his Baby on Board sticker?

17/11/22 20:14:25

Boris Johnson: Always sticking his oar in

10/11/22 16:13:25

"...and we never had a problem with Borrowers ever again."

08/11/22 10:07:55

"...and tonight we investigate the dangers of addiction to cosmetic procedures."

21/10/22 19:37:09

"That Lady Chatterley works her gardeners to the bone."

20/10/22 7:13:55

"Drat! I've got a puncture, where's the repair kit?"
"Having a nap."

12/10/22 7:44:49

"Wave? Who to...?"

28/09/22 7:23:24

"Stop moaning and get on with it, we'll go to the park when this is done," said Sophie.

17/09/22 8:06:50

"...and now, kids, I'm going to teach you about gravity."

16/09/22 13:18:44

"By a landslide victory, we give you the winner of the 2022 Hide and Seek Championship."

27/08/22 7:12:14

"Your hairstyle makes you look so... so... cheep."

26/08/22 12:11:15

"Who's been treading on the furniture?"

15/08/22 7:03:18

"I hate 'em, horrid creatures scurrying around. They make my skin crawl," muttered the spider.

10/08/22 19:35:46

They fitted the Pink Panther reasonably well but he didn't like the den-im, den-im, den-im...

04/08/22 7:10:45

My Big Fat Gecko Wedding

27/07/22 19:16:21

lol

🎵 Steinway to heaven

25/07/22 11:45:14