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18/01/24 8:12:29, edited: 15/03/24 18:17:37 |
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Many congratulations, James - blooming marvellous!
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01/09/23 19:02:48, edited: 15/03/24 18:19:32 |
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Love your caption James. You're gonna need a bigger vote 😉
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"This is most embarrassing, but could you help? Somehow I've caught my penis in the fence." 18/07/21 11:55:41 |
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Many congratulations, James! I've been out of it a while with Covid and missed some pictures entirely, so this has come as a new delight. A very worthy winner!
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10/01/24 8:33:06 |
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Hahahahahaha. That's hilarious! You've made me choke on my toast.
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11/07/24 11:11:14, edited: 03/08/24 8:02:15 |
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Thanks all for the kind words, Chris for the pic (and the site), Karyn for the Find, all the voters, and Jo for the Supervote. Also, cheers to Steve for forcing me to abandon my Goldilocks work in progress and think of something else ;) Happy captio
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23/03/19 8:46:34 |
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Haha. I don't mind chipping in a tenner for second place (it definitely will not be one of mine)!! Great caption. Genuinely choked on my toast. So thanks for nearly killing me!
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22/01/19 8:22:17 |
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Thanks Dave and everyone else. Chuffed to be on the board and loving the spirit of Caption.me. Will continue to represent the hobbits down here in NZ. Cheers all.
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"I don't like this bit. Skip to the end where I win." 02/09/24 19:01:09 |
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I wouldn't say deep thought on my part, more of an off shoot or tangent inspired by your caption. I do like the way you put it.I also like when there's ideas like this that there's potential to play around with. I wouldn't wan
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*Ding* 13/01/23 12:10:08, edited: 13/01/23 12:31:58 |
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I agree with KT A. This is a killer.
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"Bloody typical," muttered Dave. "I just paid £25 for mine." 20/01/24 12:10:18 |
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This public gathering is just asking to get Corona. 12/05/20 7:16:32 |
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Looks like the shit's hit the van. 16/07/23 7:23:55 |
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"Lord Vader, the Rebels are attacking. Perhaps you should change out of your pyjamas." 27/12/22 20:01:39 |
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18/06/22 7:00:31 |
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Cheers for the congrats, guys. I think I was lucky to pip Tony's one, so I'm very glad he got a 2nd place prize. A big cheer out to the caption.me contributors who have made this extra prize possible. And, as always, many thanks to Chris for the...
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17/03/22 8:01:22 |
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09/03/21 12:35:25 |
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...and along with the suit he was wearing.
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28/04/20 19:23:57 |
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First off, I'd like to thank the Academy ... no but seriously, thanks to Chris for picking #3 (I too preferred it to my other), and kudos to Smuldo for being equal #1. Thanks also to Mr. Dome for his "BeeSI: Miami", which forced me to edit my ...
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...followed closely by 12 disciples, a horde of Romans, and the Benny Hill theme music. 01/05/24 11:06:27, edited: 01/05/24 12:38:16, |
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13/11/23 8:01:26 |
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Nice one ... It took me a while
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29/04/23 7:05:06 |
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"Disaster here in the Paralympic eventing course as Wu Chan's wheelchair refuses to take that jump." 01/12/22 20:07:31 |
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"Gosh darn it," said Davy-Bob. "Nobody told me you could reload them." 12/12/21 12:08:44 |
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Javelins should only be thrown outdoors. 03/02/20 12:00:41 |
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The good news is she was standing just past the world record distance.
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17/12/24 20:00:35 |
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"Ah, here's the problem, son. Some idiot has wrapped half a shirt sleeve round the fan belt." 08/12/24 8:13:40 |
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Ideal for preventing skid marks. 24/05/24 7:01:21, edited: 24/05/24 7:15:24 |
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Please go ahead.
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05/02/24 8:01:50, edited: 05/02/24 8:21:59 |
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15/10/23 19:13:01 |
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Best Captioneer a few weeks in a row and The Wolf gets all cocky. 28/09/23 19:17:44 |
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Yea I wanna C a Camel toe.
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I have a strange urge to whack her with an oversize rubber mallet. 17/11/20 9:17:11 |
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The cheap seats at the opera are OK. Just make sure you duck when they turn the spotlights on. 31/07/20 7:09:57 |
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10/10/24 19:03:29 |
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18/07/24 7:06:40, edited: 18/07/24 7:24:18 |
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21/03/24 12:00:40 |
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Some people shouldn't be allowed to raise children. 16/09/22 11:00:35 |
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Usually, they're called parents.
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"Perfect, my last batch was a little on the dark side." 29/03/22 19:28:20 |
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"I'm sorry luv, but Noah said I'm only allowed to bring one, and Nancy's got better tits." 06/04/21 11:26:41 |
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"Yes, but I don't think Nancy is the right monkey for you on this trip, Joan," said Percy. :^)
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Harold always believed the son shone out of his arse. 27/08/20 7:00:40 |
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If dodos had been better jugglers they wouldn't be extinct. 08/02/20 12:00:17 |
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21/05/19 11:00:27 |
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It was a beautiful wedding, but the honeymoon in France didn't end well. 01/03/19 20:13:39 |
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"The Spiderman convention. You?" 17/12/24 12:07:45 |
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"Bank job."
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The Four Riders of the Alpacalypse 14/01/24 8:17:49 |
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17/08/23 19:05:32, edited: 17/08/23 19:06:03 |
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"Hang on, mum, we haven't tied the string round Billy's bad tooth yet." 18/12/22 20:43:09 |
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...and who can forget Dave's final words: 27/04/21 19:40:05 |
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"Pssst! Word of advice. Some Russians might take offence to this as they might see it as an insult to their National animal, however I know that you're talking about it's actual state of being. If you're urinal cake is glowing a funny colour o...
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27/11/20 8:36:38 |
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😂😂😂 I’ve since looked at a Kiwi bird on Images and now it all makes sense and it’s a brilliant caption. I couldn’t stop laughing when I saw what the Kiwi bird looked like. I am going to lol this caption because it’s funny and clev...
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Nobody makes better balloon animals than Dave. 29/09/20 19:15:41 |
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Always start with a blowfish
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Giving up smoking, diary entry day 23: Either I'm starting to hallucinate or my wife is a bitch. 03/03/19 20:47:18 |
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No she’s not, she menthol 🙃
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"Just a little bit off the topiary, thanks." 03/12/24 8:01:09 |
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14/10/24 7:04:51 |
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"Could you hurry it up, my knees are killing me." 19/09/24 11:11:33 |
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Fairytales are great and all, but finding accommodation is a right bitch when you marry a mermaid. 23/08/24 7:14:01 |
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"OK, get off, kid. It's your big sister's turn." 10/07/24 7:03:44 |
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"Um... just cover it back up," said Tony Robinson. 13/05/24 19:20:44 |
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29/03/24 21:30:50, edited: 29/03/24 21:32:27 |
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09/03/24 8:06:15, edited: 09/03/24 8:07:26 |
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04/03/24 20:09:39 |
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"It was either this or pineapple." 24/02/24 20:04:31 |
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16/01/24 8:16:36 |
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30/12/23 12:11:12 |
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"I thought after 80 years he'd have forgiven me for eating his porridge!" 29/09/23 7:05:07, edited: 29/09/23 7:12:23 |
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"I'm sure we've met, but I'm sorry, my short term memory is terrible." 22/09/23 7:03:59 |
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16/11/22 20:01:07, edited: 16/11/22 20:01:48 |
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"So God created Adam in His own image, which, strangely, was that of a 70s pornstar." 07/05/22 12:28:08 |
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14/12/20 8:05:11 |
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Barbie hasn't changed much in the last 60 years. Ken on the other hand ... 24/11/20 8:17:40 |
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Well that's interesting and disturbing Willie. I bet Ken's namesake had a fun childhood growing up as the kid who has a penis-less incestuous plastic doll named after him.
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Always buy your catnip from a trusted source. 08/09/20 13:23:56 |
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Looks like the match went to sudden death. 17/07/19 7:30:33 |
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22/12/24 8:17:55 |
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"Sorry, luv, it had been a while." 07/11/24 12:03:42 |
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18/08/24 19:02:37 |
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"j.vxd tyuiojkmn njy s[l; hj jggt jhb v rstdebg" 21/04/24 21:46:59 |
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"Ok, girls, now our husbands have gone, let's put away the Tupperware and bring out the vibrators." 22/02/24 20:01:42, edited: 23/02/24 5:26:55, |
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This is the type of arrant pedantry up with which I shall not put.
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01/02/24 20:07:16 |
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"WATCH WHERE YOU'RE FLYING THAT SLEIGH YOU FAT BASTARD!!" 24/12/23 20:05:41 |
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07/11/23 8:04:00 |
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"And here's 4,999 I prepared earlier." 11/08/23 19:20:11 |
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10/08/23 19:47:41 |
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I guess the moral of the story is to be careful what's down under when you're Down Under.
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"Are you going to take the train, Dave?" 18/06/23 7:03:56 |
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"The worst thing about Great Floods," moaned God. "Is having to dry everything afterwards." 04/06/23 11:01:22 |
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01/01/23 20:00:20 |
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09/11/22 12:00:44 |
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What the hell is Sambuchino, and why is throwing it at gnomes a good defence? 31/08/22 7:10:06 |
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09/07/22 7:00:27 |
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"That's OK, you're swimming in our septic tank." 19/05/22 7:02:06 |
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08/10/21 7:08:37 |
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"Sorry to intrude, but could I please have my rubber bone back?" 19/07/21 7:07:59 |
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Sadly, none of the gospels recorded Jesus's performance of YMCA. 23/04/21 11:12:14 |
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Described by critics as 'rather wooden'.
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22/03/21 8:04:11 |
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US politics are insane, General Lee speaking. 24/01/21 8:06:09 |
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12/04/20 7:01:39 |
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"... and then he took his shirt off and things started to get weird." 09/04/20 19:40:08 |
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No animals were harmed during the making of this picture, but some were highly pissed off. 25/03/20 8:07:25 |
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"No animals were harmed" - just someone's dignity.
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"Ok Dave, you create a diversion while I steal the mini." 09/01/20 12:14:25 |
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05/12/19 8:04:18 |
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02/09/19 7:57:49 |
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"One way or another Monsieur, you will leave a tip." 05/03/19 12:24:57 |
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15/02/19 20:16:18 |
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The rough end of Sesame Street. 27/12/24 8:15:36 |
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suggested edits
email us
It's a different kind of porn.
7:30am
comment on caption:
"Honey, the baby's trying to buy guns online."
"Well, at least it's a change from porn." [James Lennox]
And to date that's not even the most interesting thing about him.
11:15pm
comment on caption:
And the little green men from Alpha Centauri had heard Earthlings were mostly harmless...
[Several nods, Douglas Adams] [James Lennox]
Sorry Willie. Edited while you were voting. Will revert if you prefer earlier version.
EDIT: A new vote so best leave it as is. Hope that's OK with you.
1:02pm
comment on caption:
Marketing really should have explained the term "bottomless cup" to manufacturing. [James Lennox]
No worries. It's all water under the bridge.
8:04pm
comment on caption:
Marketing really should have explained the term "bottomless cup" to manufacturing. [James Lennox]
It looks more like water mixed with beans in the foyer, however that doesn't quite have the same ring to it.
11:49am
comment on caption:
Marketing really should have explained the term "bottomless cup" to manufacturing. [James Lennox]
Holy crap. So sorry 8:01:02. I always read all the captions. No idea how I missed yours. I'll edit mine and vote yours.
7:21am
comment on caption:
"Listen up kid, and I'll explain what 'Not tonight, honey, I'm stuffed' really means." [James Lennox]
The way to get around this is to continue watching the porn movie but focus more on the other mothers in the orgy. You shouldn't need to instinctively protect yourself because after all your Mum's only doing what's natural and after all it is how you were conceived, okay maybe not from that particular orgy but still.
It's not as if your Mum's the Virgin Mary.
7:30am
comment on caption:
If you accidentally see your mother naked, holding a 15 inch dildo, your brain may instinctively protect itself. [James Lennox]
Then after you discover a porn movie with your Dad in it, again you need to focus more on the other Dads in the orgy. You shouldn't need to instinctively protect yourself because after all your Dad's only doing what's natural and after all it is how you were conceived, okay maybe not from that particular orgy but still.
It's not as if your Dad's John the Baptist.
7:41pm
comment on caption:
If you accidentally see your mother naked, holding a 15 inch dildo, your brain may instinctively protect itself. [James Lennox]
He might as well be anon parent.
8:31am
comment on caption:
I don't blame you, kid, I think by now we all want to inject this guy full of strychnine. [James Lennox]
Then after you discover a porn movie with your Legal Guardian in it after your parents were killed in that freak dildo accident, again you need to focus on the other spread eagled legal guardians. You shouldn't need to instinctively protect yourself because your legal guardian is only doing what's natural.
It's not as if your legal guardian's Pontius Pilot.
12:47pm
comment on caption:
If you accidentally see your mother naked, holding a 15 inch dildo, your brain may instinctively protect itself. [James Lennox]